


Saints Collide Face to Face

by Fornever_Eden



Category: Suits (TV)
Genre: AU: Mike is not a lawyer, Angst with a Happy Ending, Baby, Blow Jobs, Light BDSM, Light Dom/sub, Loads of Angst, M/M, Mike has a sister, Minor Character Death, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-22
Updated: 2014-08-11
Packaged: 2018-02-09 23:41:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 35,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2002527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fornever_Eden/pseuds/Fornever_Eden
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Are you asking me to break up with him?”</p><p>“No.” Jessica clicked her tongue. “I’m not asking you to do anything. I wouldn’t stoop so low. All I’m saying is that family wouldn’t hold someone back from succeeding, from reaching their full potential. Family would support them at whatever the cost. If you truly care about Harvey as family, like you claim, then you wouldn’t prevent him from the future that you know he is capable of. You know he can be so much more than a paralegal.” Jessica leaned back in her chair. “I’m not asking because you will if you love him.”</p><p>Or: Mike and Harvey have been dating since high school. When tragedy strikes and Mike is left caring for his new niece. Leaving both of them with an uncertain future.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A good part of the story is canon but there shouldn't be spoilers. If there are I will put a disclaimer.  
> Mike and Harvey are only a year apart. Basically Harvey just graduated college when Jessica gives him her famous offer. And Mike is about to enter his senior year of college.
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Suits or the music that appears in the chapters; they belong to the respective parties. I do not make money from this. Some lines that appear in the story are reimagined from the show and is used purely for entertainment value.
> 
> The title is from the song below.  
> 
> 
> Some say when hearts race there's no saving grace
> 
> Tho Cruel fate I'll just wait cuz nothing can sway
> 
> Someday maybe they'll change u change u
> 
> But don't let don't let em lead u lead u astray
> 
> Stay young
> 
> Stay young
> 
> Cuz someday they'll try to break u break u
> 
> But baby I won't let em take u take u away
> 
> We might pace and time chase but there lies a place
> 
> Where all hopes and all saints collide face to face
> 
>   
> "Someday"-LP

**Chapter 1 ******

****

**Present Day**

  


Everything seemed to slow down; the sounds became muffled, he couldn’t hear anything. The only sound was the sudden cry it made after a nurse rubbed it down. A few nurses told him that they were going to take it down to the natal care unit for a routine check, but as far they could tell it was healthy and nearly full term. There were bittersweet smiles. 

There is no way to fully prepare for a sudden death. Yet, here was Michael Ross standing in the hospital room clutching a small bundle while his loving older sister slowly faded away. He couldn’t prepare for that. Any of this. He looked down at the being wrapped in the standard stark white hospital blanket in his arms. He blinked several times trying to remember when the nurses came back handing him the bundle. His memory never failed him. But this time it did. It didn’t look anything like Miranda or Miranda’s husband, Sam. It kept its eyes shut as if it realized its unexpected appearance also marked a sudden tragedy. 

‘I should probably stop referring to it as an ‘it.’ Mike thought to himself. The doctor must have told him the sex of the baby. Miranda and Sam wanted the sex to be a surprise. Mike laughed darkly when he realized that they died before ever knowing if they had a daughter or a son. 

Mike was vaguely aware that one of the doctors patted him on his shoulder while nurses solemnly unplugged various machines. A time was called out, a shuffle of clipboards, and more pats on his shoulders. He wanted to ask why they were patting him, why the time was called out. He wanted to ask why his sister had to die.

“Mr. Ross,” One of the nurses came up to Mike holding a piece of paper. “I’m sorry, but you have to fill these forms out. You can take your time. I’m going to take your niece down to natal care for now.” Mike accepted the forms. The letters seemed to float around on the forms forming illegible words. “Mr. Ross,” The nurse said still holding it—his niece. “It’s not my place, but would you like me to call someone?”

Mike looked up at her, finally. She had nice eyes. They reminded him of Miranda. It was the same soft blue eyes. “Harvey.” He whispered shakily. He knew he should be the one to call Harvey, but he didn’t trust his voice to say the things that he needed to.

“Can I borrow your phone?” 

Mike nodded slowly reaching into his pocket to hand her his phone. She quickly scrolled through the contacts finding Harvey’s name. Mike was just glad that he changed Harvey’s name from Top Dog.

“He said he’d be right here.” The nurse informed him. “I’m sorry, Mr. Ross. I’m taking your niece down to natal care now.” Mike nodded again.

‘Was it really only a week ago?’ Mike thought.

  
 ****

**One week ago…**

  


“Mike?” Harvey called out as he untied his shoes. He swore when his hand scraped over an exposed nail. The apartment wasn’t anything to brag about, but to them it was home. Every time Harvey pointed out a crack in the wall or peeling paint, Mike just said it gave the place character. He made up a story for each and every character in the apartment. One crack was made when the previous owners had some particularly amazing sex. That gave Harvey a few ideas on how to add more crack.

“Hey, how was work?” Mike said poking his head out from the kitchen. “I’m making spaghetti for dinner. Did you get the bread?”

Harvey swore. “Sorry I forgot.” He rummaged in one of the drawers looking for a Band-Aid even though he should probably be worried about tetanus. 

“What’s wrong?” Mike wiped his hands on a towel frowning. “What happened?”

“Scrapped my hand on Niall. I thought you called the Supe about the exposed nails.” Niall was apparently a vengeful spirit hell-bent on attacking residents. The story gave Mike nightmares for a week. 

Mike laughed nervously, “Oops. I’ll call tomorrow. I’m writing a note.” He said reassuring Harvey by writing it on the whiteboard on the fridge. “But that wasn’t what I meant. I was talking about what happened at work. Something is bothering you.”

Harvey sighed for once hating how Mike some how always knew when something was wrong. “Someone backdated a document.” The muscles in his jaw clenched at the thought. 

“So why is that a problem? Didn’t you tell the guy?” Mike quickly added seeing Harvey’s expression change to disgust. “May be it was a mistake.”

Harvey shook his head. “Don’t be naïve. It wasn’t a mistake. The guy missed the file date and is trying to fix it.”

“Now what?”

Harvey bit his lip. “I’m not sure. I know I should tell my boss, but the guy is probably going to get fired. I don’t want that on my hands.”

“Yeah, but if what you’re saying is true then the guy brought it upon himself. And if a judge finds out about it then the firm can get in trouble. Annnnd…” Mike began plating their dinner and poured a glass of red wine. Glancing at Harvey, Mike poured a little more wine into Harvey’s glass.

“I know; if they find out that I knew and didn’t say anything I will be the one in trouble.” Harvey sighed dragging his hand down his face. 

“Then you have your answer.” 

Harvey reached out for Mike to step between his legs. “Thanks.” He said pressing a kiss to Mike’s lips. Mike deepened the kiss tracing Harvey’s lips with his tongue, tasting the faint traces of the red wine.

“I only told you what you already knew.” Mike breathlessly replied pressing his forehead against Harvey’s. “I love your sense of ethics.”

“Love you, too.” Harvey said closing his eyes. “I hope this spaghetti is better than last week’s.”

>>>

“MIKE!” Harvey called out once he entered the apartment not even pausing to untie his shoes. “MIKE!”

“What? What’s wrong? Who died?” Mike said racing out of the bathroom. He barely had time to tuck himself back into his pants when Harvey’s voice rang throughout the apartment. Harvey quickly embraced Mike tightly. “Can’t…breathe…” Mike said patting him on the back. 

Harvey quickly loosened his arms only to kiss Mike with the same amount of passion. “I don’t know how Jessica Pearson, as in my boss, found out that I was accepted into Harvard, but she offered to pay for it. And a job at the firm as an associate after I graduate.”

“What?! Oh my god, that’s amazing!” Mike said kissing Harvey. “Wait backup why did she give that to you?”

“I told her about the backdating and that if she didn’t report the misconduct then I would go to the DA. She said I had some balls.” Mike snickered, agreeing. Harvey gently flicked Mike’s nose. “Shut up, you immature brat. She was impressed.”

“That’s awesome.” Mike exclaimed again. “We need to celebrate.”

Needless to say the sex that night was amazing.

“But you know the shitty part is that we’re going to be apart.” Mike said softly. He lazily drew patterns on Harvey’s chest with his finger. “I’m going to be here finishing school and you’re going to be in Boston.”

“It’ll just be one year. Then you’ll join me at Harvard. Plus Boston is only four hours away.” Harvey yawned. “We’ll figure it out.”

  
 ****

**Present Day**

  


Panic flooded through Harvey when a nurse using Mike’s phone said that he should come to the hospital, Mike needed him. His only relief was that the nurse reassured him that Mike wasn’t hurt. But she was unable to give him anything useful because of HIPAA laws. 

Harvey shouted at Jessica that he had to go it was an emergency before running the mile to the hospital. A hundred different thoughts raced through his mind wondering what could have happened. If Mike wasn’t hurt then why was he at the hospital? Did he have an accident during a delivery? Was Grammy or Miranda hurt? Did Miranda go into labor early? Why didn’t Sam call him? Why not Miranda? Harvey shook his head trying to clear it of all of those useless thoughts. There was no use pondering those thoughts, he had to focus; he was close to the hospital.

He skidded to a stop right outside of the hospital entrance panting. Taking a deep breath, he entered hoping that he at least looked slightly composed. A nurse, who he could only assume was the one who called, told him where to find Mike. 

Mike sat on a chair outside of a room where orderlies were still cleaning. He stared blankly at the opposite wall.

“Mike?” Harvey said gently even though he was breathing heavily. He stroked Mike’s cheek waiting to see any sign of recognition. 

“Harvey?” Mike looked up at Harvey. “What are you doing here? What time is it?”

“It’s 3.” Harvey squatted so he was eye level with Mike. “What happened? The nurse couldn’t tell me.”

Mike refused to look Harvey in the eyes as tears welled up in his eyes. He didn’t—couldn’t say the words because if he did then it meant that it was real. It meant that she was really gone. He couldn’t do that. Not yet.

“Hey I need you to talk to me.” Harvey said. It tore him apart not knowing what to do or how to fix whatever happened. “Is it Grammy?”

Mike quickly shook his head causing the tears he was so desperately trying to hold back to fall. “Miranda and Sam…They were driving on the freeway. A car swerved into their lane. He…lost control of the car.” Mike whispered in between sobs. He stopped trying to hold everything in. “He died at the scene, but Miranda survived barely. The doctors told me the odds of both her and the baby surviving is—was minimal at best. I had to choose Harvey! Oh god, she’ll never forgive me. Oh god.” Mike hid his face in his hands.

“What did you do?” Harvey gently moved Mike’s hand to look at him. Harvey’s chest clenched tightly unsure if he truly wanted to know. But he had to know. “Who did you choose?”

“I must have said the baby because a nurse handed me something.” A fresh wave of tears poured out of Mike as he hiccupped. “I should have saved her. She’s my sister.”

Harvey shook his head. “I think she’ll forgive you. I think she’s glad that her child is safe.” He pressed a tender kiss of each of Mike’s eyes whispering that everything was going to be okay. “Mike what are these?” Harvey asked finally looking at the papers that Mike was clutching.

“I don’t know. They gave it to me, but it doesn’t make sense. It’s not in English.”

“Okay let me see.” Harvey took the papers out of Mike’s tight grasp. Smoothing out the wrinkles, Harvey carefully read each page. Mike watched Harvey’s lips silently mouth a few words. This was what Mike loved about Harvey; he has always been able to remain Mike’s constant rock. He had to possess some sort of superpower to be able to remain calm even though there was a storm raging inside of Mike. 

Whenever Mike started to stress about not being able to do something, Harvey was there to help him. He never told Mike how to figure it out, which Mike always appreciated. But Harvey was there point him in the right direction and to push him to try to figure it out on his own first. Harvey was the shove that Mike needed. And Mike was Harvey’s reminder that vulnerability wasn’t a weakness; it was an asset. It meant he was human and alive. 

The muscles in Harvey’s jaw tightened at the bold letterings on the next page. “It’s a birth certificate and two certificates of death. You have to decided on a name.”

“I don’t know.” Mike grimaced at the thought of naming a child. He had no idea what Miranda and Sam wanted to name their child.

“It’s okay Mike, we can do that later. First, have you called Grammy?” Harvey wrapped his arms around Mike just letting him know that he wasn’t alone.

“Oh god no.” Mike shook his head. “She’s going to have a heart attack.”

“Okay I’m going to call Grammy.”

In the end Grammy rushed over from her book club. Right before she broke down into tears she reprimanded the two men for not informing her sooner. She kept wondering why her family had to keep dying. Mike pulled Harvey in to the hug as he held Grammy tightly at they both wept. 

“Don’t die, Michael, please don’t die. I can’t outlive someone else.” She cried. Mike nodded. That’s when he knew he had to be the one to take care of the baby. At first Grammy didn’t like the idea of leaving Mike alone with a baby since he was known to forget to feed his goldfish. But it was deemed better to let Grammy have some semblance of a retirement for once. 

They decided to name the baby Miranda Samantha Ross, after her parents. They figured letting people think she was Mike’s daughter would be easier if she had the name Ross. 

The nurses were nice enough to purchase diapers, bottles, and formula for Mike. They showed Mike and Harvey how to feed Miranda, how to burp her (apparently do not slap her back), how to change her, and how to hold her. They wished them luck as he and Harvey made their way back to their apartment with baby Miranda in their arms.

The funeral for Miranda and Sam was small, just the way they would have wanted it. It wasn’t like there was a lot of family left on either side. Sam’s parents had passed way years before along with any grandparents. But the family that did show up, shot Mike and Harvey looks and whispered about how a gay couple was going to care for a baby. Mike wanted to ask how does any couple care for a baby? He really wanted to know. Most of the time he felt like he barely had his head above the water. His only life support was Harvey.

>>>

“I never asked you if you’re okay with this.” Mike said suddenly one day as he put Miranda down for into her crib. All of the new baby things cluttered the already small apartment. He was lucky that his sister was so excited to have a child that she went out and bought a lot of the things he needed. 

“You needed to?” Harvey raised his eyebrow. “Miranda was a like a sister to me. We’ll figure it out. We also have.”

Mike smiled. “Thanks, I don’t deserve you.”

“Yeah you’re probably right.”

Mike rolled his eyes as he sank down into the couch. It felt like he hadn’t slept in a week, which was probably accurate. Miranda kept him and Harvey up most nights crying. Actually a few of the neighbors knocked on the door asking when they got a baby. One even called the police worried that the gay neighbors may have kidnapped a baby in a desperate attempt at having a family. So they learned to keep the custody papers close to the door.

“I’ve thought about it.” Harvey said looking straight ahead at the blank TV. They found out early on that action movies woke Miranda up. Mike spent almost every waking minute reading every child rearing book he could find instead. “I’ll find work as a paralegal. It can’t be that hard. I’m sure Jessica can find me something.”

“But isn’t that going to be a little hard if you’re at Harvard.” Mike looked at Harvey quizzically.

“I’m not going.”

“Harvey, don’t be stupid. Jessica is paying for you to go to Harvard. You have to go.” Mike said almost shouting until he caught sight of the crib. 

“Mike you have one more year at NYU. Finish your degree; Miranda and Grammy always wanted someone in the family to get a college education.”

“Yeah, but…”

“Someone has to make money.” Harvey said softly. “Jessica will understand deferring Harvard for a it.”

“It’s just you’re meant for more. It’s your dream to be a name partner.” Harvey shot him a look. “Goal I mean. Harvey Specter doesn’t have dreams he has goals.” Mike said mockingly.

“It’s still my goal. It’s just right now my goal is to support my family.”

“Your family.” Mike smiled fondly. “I like the sound of that. May be one day we’ll get married.”

“Don’t push it kid.”

>>>

The next day Harvey went to talk to Jessica about the possibility of postponing Harvard for a year while he worked as a paralegal. 

“Let me get this straight. I offer you practically a silver platter and you not only accept, but you ask for a silver spoon as well.” Jessica said calmly raising her eyebrow. Any normal human would be cowering at her feet, but not Harvey. “I saw a lot of potential, but don’t think for a second that you’re irreplaceable. What happened? Why would you settle for a paralegal position?”

“My boyfriend,” Jessica’s eyebrows shot up, which was only matched by Harvey’s one as if silently challenging her to comment. “My boyfriend’s sister and brother-in-law passed away recently. And he decided to care for their newborn baby.”

“How is this your problem?”

“He’s my boyfriend.” Harvey said matter-of-factly.

Jessica only looked at him harder. 

“He has one more year at NYU. I want him to able to focus on school and the baby, not school, baby, and how to survive. Since I already graduated it’ll be easier for me to get a job with a higher pay.” Harvey explained. He hated how he was basically being forced to explain his whole life to someone he barely knew.

“This baby is his. You need to think about your own future. Your future is at Harvard and at this firm. My original offer won’t change. Accept it for what it is or don’t. You make your bed you sleep in it. Understand that if you accept it, you’re going to Boston alone this fall. I will not have you distracted by a boyfriend and a baby.”

Harvey nodded. “Then think of this as my two-weeks notice.” With that he turned on his heel and walked out.

When Harvey got home, he found both Mike and Miranda asleep on the couch. He chuckled at the sight amazed at how similar Miranda was to Mike.

An hour later, Harvey gently woke Mike up telling him it was dinnertime. Mike swore saying now Miranda wasn’t going to sleep through the night.

“Hmm, steak.” Mike inhaled deeply. “What is this? Make up steak? I know it isn’t celebratory steak; there’s no wine. You brought out the scotch. So what did you do?”

“Jessica said no.” Harvey angrily cut into the steak relaying everything that she told him to Mike.

“You should go.” Mike cradled Miranda coxing her to accept her bottle. “It’s your best shot. Plus like you said it’s just a year. She’s paying for Harvard otherwise we would have to pay.”

“You don’t get it.” Harvey put down his fork with a loud clank startling Miranda. “Sorry.”

“What don’t I get?” Mike gently rocked Miranda until she settled back down. “We talked about this. You know, telling me what you’re really feeling.”

Harvey sighed. “I don’t want to be away from you and Miranda.”

Mike looked at Harvey and smiled. “Neither do I. Are you sure about this?” 

Harvey nodded. “Positive.”

>>>

A few days later, Mike carried Miranda in a carrier on his chest as he walked toward the mailroom at Gordon Schmidt Van Dyke. He and Harvey had decided to grab lunch together at a nearby diner. Since Mike was able to get Miranda ready relatively quickly he thought he’d surprise Harvey.

“Michael Ross?” Someone asked. She was stunning in a fierce sort of way. Intimidating really. Looking at her Mike knew he had just entered a lion’s den. 

“Yes. How did you know?” 

“Jessica Pearson.” She said holding her hand out. “I believe it’s time we met.” She turned on her heel heading for an empty office. Mike looked around unsure if he was supposed to follow her or what. But with a quick glance at the receding form he thought may be he could change her mind.

“Please sit.” She waved to one of the chairs. There was nothing pleasant about the smile she gave him. Mike was glad he had Miranda. If he crapped his pants he could blame Miranda. “I understand you’re dating Harvey and that you decided to raise your late sister’s baby. That’s very brave of you.”

“I don’t know if I would say brave. She's basically the only family I have left, except for Grammy and Harvey.”

“You consider Harvey family?”

Mike nodded unsure of where this conversation was headed.

“I’m glad.” Jessica replied. “I’m sure you’re the type of person who would do anything for family.”

“Where is this going?”

“Michael—“

“Mike.”

“Michael, you have a good future. You were expelled for the Snyder Prep School, but managed to receive good grades at your new high school. You even got early admissions into NYU, majoring in business, and maintained a 3.8 GPA.”

“So you checked up on me. What’s your point?” Mike said growing frustrated each minute.

“The point is that compared to your future Harvey’s future is the Holy Grail. He has unlimited potential. He can be senior partner within fifteen years.”

“What are you trying to say?”

“You’re smart Michael, figure it out.”

“Are you asking me to break up with him?”

“No.” Jessica clicked her tongue. “I’m not asking you to do anything. I wouldn’t stoop so low. All I’m saying is that family wouldn’t hold someone back from succeeding, from reaching their full potential. Family would support them at whatever the cost. If you truly care about Harvey as family, like you claim, then you wouldn’t prevent him from the future that you know he is capable of. You know he can be so much more than a paralegal.” Jessica leaned back in her chair. “I’m not asking because you will if you love him.”

>>>

Harvey was worried; Mike hadn’t shown up at the diner like they agreed. But he thought maybe Mike had fallen asleep and didn’t realize what time it was. Once Harvey returned to the firm he tried the house phone, but there was no answer. Something was wrong Harvey could feel it.

“Mike?” Harvey called out once he returned to the apartment. He toed off his shoes as his heart pounded in his chest. He rounded the corned into the living room finding it void of all baby things. Quickly, Harvey went into their bedroom throwing open the closet only to find his clothes hanging. He stumbled backward until he found the edge of the bed. Right on the nightstand as if it knew exactly where Harvey was going to land was an envelope with a note. 

__

_Dear Harvey,_

__

_I’m sorry. There are no words to completely express how sorry I am. But I’m leaving. Please don’t come looking for me. Don’t bother Grammy. I’ll keep in touch with her and you can ask her for updates. I doubt you will though knowing you. Not after what she tells you._

__

_So, Miranda and I are leaving. I don’t know where to yet. But when we reach there, we’ll know._

__

_Take care and study hard. I know you’ll be the best lawyer in ~~New York~~ the world._

__

_I will always love you,_  
 _Mike and Miranda._

Numbly he dialed Grammy’s number. “Grammy, where’s Mike?”

“He was here a little while ago. Oh hold on, he said you’d call. I didn’t understand at the time.” Grammy muttered. The crinkling sound of an envelope being opened penetrated Harvey’s ears. “He wrote you letter saying it would be too difficult to tell you himself. He’s leaving.”

“What does it say?” Harvey asked hoarsely. 

“He said, he’d been sleeping with Trevor. He shouldn’t joke.”

“I’m sorry. I won’t bother you again.”

“Harvey…” Grammy tried before he cut her off.

“Was that really necessary?” Grammy turned to look at her grandson sitting at the kitchen table. He simply nodded holding back the tears. “I don’t know what happened, but I hope this doesn’t come back to bite you in the ass. I’m getting too old to clean up your messes.”

>>>

Harvey picked up the phone again and dialed the direct number to Jessica’s phone.

“Pearson.” 

“Jessica, it’s Harvey. I accept your terms.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When you try your best, but you don't succeed
> 
> When you get what you want, but not what you need
> 
> When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
> 
> Stuck in reverse
> 
> And the tears come streaming down your face
> 
> When you lose something you can't replace
> 
> When you love someone, but it goes to waste
> 
> Could it be worse?
> 
>   
> 
> 
> "Fix You"-Coldplay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and commenting! I'm actually surprised at the speed I am writing this story. I've been basically holed up in my house writing for the past few days. I pretty much have everything written. That's why this chapter is being posted so soon. The whole story should be around 5 chapters, I think.
> 
>  
> 
> The first section is seven years from the events in chapter 1. The second section is 22 years from the events of first section. I couldn't think of a less complicated way other than linear...Let me know if it's confusing and I can figure something out.

**Chapter 2**

  
**7 years ago**

Mike was walking up the short flight of stairs leading to his new apartment when he heard a soulful saxophone melody that seemed to seep through to his very being coming from one of the apartments. He hadn’t realized that he stopped right in front of the apartment where the music was coming from, or that the music had stopped. He was mesmerized. The door suddenly swung inward while the teenager on the other side yelled out that he was going to the library.

“Was that you?” Mike asked suddenly as he shifted the box he was holding.

The other teen cocked his eyebrow as if to ask ‘what the hell are you talking about?’ He held his breath when he saw Mike’s clear, sparkling blue eyes. He wasn’t going to be cheesy and say that this kid stole his breath.

“The music.” 

“No.” The teen scratched his forehead trying to hide the blush that was starting to make an appearance. Even though he was used to new neighbors asking who was playing the saxophone, for some reason, for the first time, he wanted to impress this kid and lie. “My dad is a saxophonist.”

“That’s awesome.”

“Mike, you little twerp stop flirting otherwise I’m telling Grammy you’re not helping.” A voice called out from behind a rather large box. The person pushed Mike farther down the hallway.

“I’m Mike by way.” Mike yelled toward the teen. “Sorry my sister is pain in the ass.”

“Yeah well your pain in the ass sister can still kick your ass.”

“Harvey.” The teen replied softly holding his hand up as if to wave.

It wasn’t until a few days later that Mike and Harvey met again in the hallway.

“Hey!” Mike said smiling. “Sorry about last time. I never caught your name.”

“It’s Harvey.”

“Nice to meet you. I’m Mike, by the way.” Mike replied. Harvey didn’t think it was possible for a smile to get bigger, but Mike somehow managed to do that. “We just moved in a few doors down.”

Harvey nodded. “From where?”

“Um, not far actually. We lived out in the Bronx, but some stuff happened.” Mike replied not looking Harvey in the eyes. It was like he suddenly realized how what he just said sounded, Mike gasped. “No, nothing bad happened. I mean it was bad, but not serious?”

“Are you asking me?” Harvey furrowed his eyebrow.

“No. Of course not!” Mike shook his head adamantly. “I got into a couple arguments with my teachers. They thought I cheated on exams.”

“Did you?”

Mike shot him a look, frowning. “No. They just didn’t like that my answers came directly from the textbook. I was just irritated that they were being lazy to create their own questions instead of copying the once from the book.”

“You memorized the book?” Harvey’s eyebrows shot high into his hairline.

“Yeah, once I read something, I understand it, and once I understand it, I never forget it. I have an eidetic memory.”

“That’s amazing.” Harvey replied. This guy standing in front of him had something that he would kill for. He hadn’t realized that they had been staring at each other until someone coughed. Confused, Harvey looked toward the stairs.

“Mike, I thought you said you were just going to get your jacket.” A guy with short dark hair and narrow eyes, which only further narrowed at the sight of Harvey. Harvey raised his eyebrow up challenging him.

“Sorry man. Trevor this is my neighbor Harvey. Harvey this is my best friend Trevor.” Trevor’s version of ‘hello’ was to tilt his chin up at Harvey, who returned the gesture. “So, I guess I’ll see ya around.” Mike beamed before waving. He wasn’t sure if he was imagining it, but Harvey was sure he heard Mike whispering to Trevor about him.

>>>

“Is this from the coffee cart guy?” Harvey asked leaning against the couch admiring the joint between his fingers. 

“Are you kidding? I can’t afford his stuff. It’s from Trevor. Said it was ‘don’t be an ass at your new school’ gift. And that he isn’t going to be there to bail me out.” Harvey’s chest still clenched painfully whenever Trevor’s name was brought up even though it had been a few weeks since they met. He still couldn’t figure out why, though. According to Mike, Trevor was just a friend. A very good friend who went to Mike’s place all the time, Harvey had thought bitterly at the time. He hadn’t even been to Mike’s place until today. “I had to remind him that _he_ was the reason I got beat up. He’s the one with the half-ass plans. But what can you do, you know?”

Harvey shook his head. “Seems like the guy is your anchor.”

“May be.” Mike said mournfully. He took the hit back from Harvey, brushing his fingers against Harvey’s. He placed the joint between his lips and inhaled, holding his breath. “That’s what everyone tells me. That cheating story I told you when we first met. Not quite true.” Harvey frowned he had already figured Mike lied. “I do have eidetic memory. My teachers didn’t think I cheated, though. Grammy and Miranda were barely making enough to cover the tuition even with the partial scholarship to that swanky ass school. It was my parent’s dream that Miranda and I go there, dunno know why. So Trevor said he would help me make some money. I wrote out the answers to an exam I took and he sold the answers. The idiot sold it to the headmaster’s daughter. The headmaster got fired and as his last official act he expelled me.”

“Sounds like a crappy friend.” Harvey said accepting the joint.

Mike shrugged. “He was the first person not to think of me as a freak. Plus, he has always been there for me.” Harvey didn’t need to ask him what he meant. He knew Mike was talking about when his parents died. He also knew he wasn’t going to change Mike’s mind about being friends with Trevor.

“Friends don’t let friends do stupid things.”

“Thanks for the PSA.” Mike laughed. “Man my mouth is dry. Do you want anything to drink?”

“Seriously? You get cotton mowth?” Harvey tried to say seriously, but started laughing when his tongue started sticking to the roof of his mouth. “You know what can help?”

Mike turned his head to look at Harvey’s chocolate brown eyes silently asking him to elaborate. It was probably the cheesiest thing Harvey ever did, but he leaned in barely touching his lips to Mike’s. Holding his breath, he waited until Mike pressed further into the kiss or moved away. But there it was the unique taste of the pot on Mike’s tongue as it entered Harvey’s mouth. As first kisses went it wasn’t the best, but neither teen could help the smile that spread across their faces. Harvey pulled Mike onto his lap to have easier access to his lips.

“Here I thought I was reading the signs wrong.” Mike said breathlessly when they finally broke apart. Harvey smiled when he noticed Mike’s puffy red lips. “Just so you know I’m starting high school next week and there are going to be a ton of hot seniors. So I don’t know if I’ll have time for a lowly sophomore like you.” 

Harvey barked a laugh. “Clearly you have no idea what Stevenson High is like. This isn’t like your small prep school you know.”

No one expected them to last a year. 

After all Harvey was the star pitcher on the baseball team (Mike couldn’t stop laughing at that saying he was probably a star pitcher in the bedroom) and Mike, well Mike was a freshman who never knew when to stop demonstrating his perfect memory.

But some how they managed to make everything work. Grammy was always thanking Harvey (when Mike wasn’t there of course) for getting Mike off of the marijuana (he wasn’t) and getting him on the straight and narrow. Harvey wasn’t too sure how much of a good influence he was especially about the marijuana since they still smoked. It was more like ever since Mike confessed, Harvey couldn’t help the unspoken judgment that crossed his face whenever Trevor was brought up. All Mike could do was shake his head. 

Miranda’s reaction to their relationship was similar. She was glad that Harvey was there to remind Mike that he was capable of more than cheating or relying on his memory. Harvey challenged him to think on a higher level and that knowledge wasn’t simply remembering what the book said, it was about understanding how to manipulate the information for your use. 

Harvey’s family was the same. They didn’t see anything wrong with the relationship. They saw how Mike managed to soften the hard edges of Harvey’s personality that had a tendency to cut people. When Harvey told his parents and Marcus that he had a boyfriend, he was met with silence. At that moment, he was sure he going to be disowned. But Marcus, in all of his 10-year-old wisdom, simply said ‘pass the peas.’ For the first time Marcus ate peas without any complaints. Harvey’s dad said ‘I knew the moment Mike moved in down the hall.’ He was a romantic. Harvey’s mom nodded. 

But after a year, Harvey noticed that Mike was spending more time with Trevor saying that some stuff was happening at Trevor’s home. Harvey trusted Mike with Trevor; at least that’s what he told himself. It was getting increasingly difficult, though. About six months into the relationship, Mike told Harvey that he and Trevor went out in middle school. Mike insisted that it wasn’t anything serious. What he had with Trevor was messy and sloppy; they were high most of the time. In no way was it similar to what he and Harvey had, other than the smoking. Not in intensity, passion, strength, support, devotion, dedication, or love, none of it. Mike had punctuated each word with a kiss starting from the nape of Harvey’s neck ending on his lips. That night was the first time they had sex. 

Harvey still didn’t trust Trevor.

The day of their one-year anniversary was on a warm summer day. Harvey took Mike to a fancier restaurant to celebrate, and he was hoping to get lucky later. But of course Trevor got in the way. After dinner they went back to Mike’s apartment since Miranda winked and agreed to take Grammy out for a dinner and a movie. Grammy knew what they were going to do. Grammy always knew. She had left a box of condom and lube out on the table for when the boys came back. All Mike could really do was shake his head, apologizing to a laughing Harvey. That was when the phone rang. Trevor was in tears saying Jenny broke up with him (again). Mike bit his lip looking at Harvey after hanging up. Harvey just rolled his eyes and said whatever, his cock had deflated when the phone rang anyways. It hadn’t. Mike gave him a quick kiss and hurried out the door. It was weird being alone in Mike’s apartment. Harvey shook his head thinking about how much Mike was a doofus. 

So, Harvey slowly made his way back to his place. He couldn’t help but wonder why Mike was so attached to a deadbeat like Trevor. It was like adding fuel to the irritation inside of Harvey knowing that Mike was willing to drop everything to be by Trevor’s side. Even on their anniversary. He was so engrossed in trying to understand the complexity of the Mike and Trevor friendship that he hadn’t realized the shoes and high heels that were scattered on the floor. But then he heard it. He recognized the heavy breathing for what it was. He recognized his mom’s high heels on the ground. And he knew that the men’s shoes weren’t his father’s, who was on tour, and it was too large to be Marcus’s. He quickly, but quietly, left the apartment bursting out of the building breathing in the warm New York air. He couldn’t get the sounds they were making out of his head.

It was bad.

Unsure of what to do only knowing that he couldn’t stay in the building, Harvey walked toward a nearby park.

As luck would have it Mike came peddling through the park an hour later.

“Harvey?” Mike asked stopping suddenly in front of the swings. “What are you doing here?”

“Mike? I thought you went to see Trevor.” Harvey looked up at Mike. Mike was biting his lip and his eyebrows were turned upward, he was worried, Harvey noted.

“That was over an hour ago. We just smoked and played some games. Then I told him that I had to go.”

A sudden irrational anger coursed through Harvey at the thought of Mike and Trevor smoking together. “Played some games? What like ‘Doctor?’”

“What are you talking about?” Mike got off his bike, leaning it on the kickstand to get a better look at Harvey. The muscles in Harvey’s jaw were so taut that Mike was sure they were going to snap.

“I know what you’re like when you’re high, Mike. You can’t keep your hands to yourself.” Harvey suddenly stood crowding Mike until Mike was forced to take a step back tripping over his bike.

“That’s only with you.” Mike replied, slowly picking himself off the ground as Harvey continued to stare down at him. “I don’t know what’s gotten into you, but I don’t like it. You’re starting to piss me off.”

“I’m starting to piss you off? I’m the one who should be fucking pissed. It’s our fucking anniversary.”

“I know, Harvey, I’m sorry. That’s why I came back.”

“Yeah probably because you felt guilty.”

“Yeah I did. If I had know you were going to react like this I would have—“

“What stayed at Trevor’s?” Harvey said cutting Mike off. “Does he fuck you better than me? Am I not fucking you enough or something? What is it? I can’t believe I was in love with a cheating fucking whore.” 

The clear blue eyes that Harvey fell in love with suddenly darkened taking with it the sudden anger that was in Harvey. His heart clenched tightly threatening to burst. His heavy breathing suddenly stopped. “Mike, I’m…” Harvey reached out for Mike’s hand before he jerked it away. “Mike, please, I didn’t mean it.” He said quietly. “Any of it. I was just jealous and hurt…”

“I’m going to go home.” Mike said slowly.

“Mike.” Harvey reached for Mike’s hand again only to be slapped away again.

Mike turned around heading toward the apartment. He suddenly stopped. “It’s funny. You called Trevor the jackass, when you’re being the jackass. And for the record you’re the only person I ever slept with, asshole.” Mike said before peddling as fast as he could away from Harvey.

Cursing at himself, Harvey was torn between following Mike and trying to convince him to listen or wallow. He chose to wallow. The only thing he wanted to do was forget everything. He wanted a do-over of the night. He wished he had asked Mike to stay instead of seeing Trevor.

Walking around the city he found himself at a nightclub. Somehow, he doesn’t remember how, but he managed to convince the bouncer to let him in even though he was underage. The bouncer should probably be fired, Harvey thought. It was easy for Harvey to lose himself to the pounding bass, and in the darken room with bright roaming lights he could forget. Letting himself be taken over, he had not idea how much time had passed. Women were eagerly buying him drinks, which he drank like they were nothing. He just wanted to forget. And he did.

The next thing Harvey knew he was waking up on an unfamiliar bed. His arm was wrapped around an unknown man’s waist. A naked waist.

“Shit.” Harvey said holding his pounding head.

“Morning. How are you feeling?” The man said rubbing his eyes. He sat up letting the sheet fall away from his chest. “Last night was fun, huh.” He responded looking at Harvey’s shocked face. He leaned across Harvey reaching for the pack of cigarettes and the lighter. “Seeing as this is my apartment I wasn’t going to sleep on the couch.”

Harvey gulped fearing the worst. “What happened?”

He smiled sadly. “Not a happy ever after.” He lit his cigarette and inhaled. “It’s time you faced the music.”

>>>

After Max (the guy) told Harvey what happened. Max dropped Harvey off at his apartment telling him that he should talk to Mike as soon as possible. The longer the silence dragged on, the harder it was going to be to get him back. So, Harvey slowly walked up the stairs leading to his floor. Even though each step felt like his legs were made out of lead as he passed his door and turned the corner for Mike’s wing. 

A new wave of guilt washed over Harvey when he saw Mike and Trevor hugging outside of Mike’s place. 

‘Of course Mike called Trevor,’ Harvey thought bitterly. ‘You have no reason to feel bitter.’ He reminded himself. This was his doing. But it didn’t stop him from tightening his fists until his nails dug into his palms.

“Mike can we talk?” Harvey said carefully only looking at Mike.

“Look at what the cat dragged in.” Trevor said gritting his teeth. Mike placed a hand on Trevor’s chest telling him to stop. 

“I want to explain.” Harvey bit his lip. “I didn’t mean anything that I said.”

“Just because you want to doesn’t mean Mike has to listen. If you want me to stay just tell me, Mike.”

“Okay.” Mike said glancing at Harvey before he pushed the open farther.

“Mike!” Trevor exclaimed. “Ask him where he was last night.”

“What?”

“I saw him get out of some guy’s car.” Trevor gestured toward Harvey. And for the second time in as many days, Harvey’s heart plummeted. “Yeah, asshole, the window faces the street.”

“Mike, nothing happened.” Harvey responded. “Please can we just talk in private?”

Mike finally met Harvey’s eyes. And he knew, just like he’s always known Harvey’s eyes, there was something else to this story. He wanted to know what it was. May be he’s a masochist or a glutton for punishment. But whatever the reason Mike agreed to let Harvey in saying Miranda and Grammy went to work already. 

So there they sat on the couch alone. Much to Trevor’s anger Mike asked him to leave. A hundred different questions flooded Mike’s brain; he couldn’t think straight so he reread Moby Dick in his head.

“I know you’re reading.” Harvey said quietly. 

“Well you’re not talking.”

Harvey ran his hand through his hair unsure of where to start or even how to start. “I was telling the truth when I said I didn’t mean any of the things I said last night.”

“You must have meant some of it. It came out of you rather quickly.” Mike replied. He got up heading toward the fridge to get a bottle of water. His hands couldn’t stop shaking.

“Here,” Harvey gently grabbed the bottle and twisted the cap off.

“How are you calm?” Mike asked. He roughly put the bottle on the table splashing a little water out.

“I’m not.” Harvey sighed. “I just learned that I say stupid things when I get worked up.”

“Only say stupid things?”

“I’m sorry for scaring you. And I didn’t sleep with him.” Harvey paused before correcting himself when Mike looked pointedly at the messy state Harvey’s hair was in. “Full disclosure? We didn’t have sex—“

“You mean you didn’t fuck him.” Mike cut in gritting out the word fuck.

Harvey nodded. “We just slept. I mean he was naked. Wait, nothing happened!” Harvey added quickly seeing Mike’s eyes widen. “I passed out. I went to a club. Some women were buying me drinks and I was an idiot. I drank everything. Max saw how some of the women were trying to take advantage of me. The same thing happened to his younger sister. He tried to get me to tell him my address, but I was too drunk. So, he took me back to his place. I puked and passed out on his bed. He sleeps nude.” Harvey explained. “Nothing happened.”

“Would you have wanted something to have happened?”

Harvey shook his head. “I shouldn’t have gone to the club to begin with. I was angry mostly about what happened between us.” Harvey walked back to the couch resting his chin on his fingertips. “I know there’s nothing that can excuse what I said, but I do have a reason. I’ll tell you if you’d just let me explain.”

Harvey told Mike everything, from his insecurity about Trevor to his mom’s infidelity. Mike listened nodding his head understandingly. 

“You know having feelings isn’t a weakness.” Mike said once Harvey finished. “I mean it shows people that you are human. I’d rather date a human than a shell.” Mike held Harvey’s hand. “You know all of this could have been avoided if you had just talked to me. You could have told me that you were uncomfortable about Trevor and I.”

“Would you have stopped hanging out with him?”

Mike thought about it for a second, “I guess not. But I would have been more upfront about it and asked if you…” Mike chuckled at the look on Harvey’s face that clearly said he didn’t want to hang out with Trevor. “Honestly Harvey, there’s nothing I could have told you to completely trust me with Trevor. He’s my best friend. Yes, he knows me in ways that you don’t, but that’s only because he’s known me longer and he knows me from a different time. But at the same time, there’s a part of me that only you’ve seen. He’ll never get to see that.”

“You mean your face at orgasm.”

Mike glared at him playfully. “So I guess the thing with your mom just pushed you over. I’m pretty sure psychologist call that displacement.”

“Wise ass.”

“Just wise is fine.”

“I’m the ass. I’m sorry.” Harvey said biting his lip. 

“Yeah you are.” Mike lifted Harvey’s chin. “But you got jealous and your mom…if there’s ever anything that’s bothering you, just tell me. Harvey, you mean a lot to me. I love you; so I don’t want this to end because of some misunderstanding.”

“I love you too.” Harvey closed his eyes as Mike’s lips crashed upon his.  
  
 **22 Years Later**  
 **Present Day**

Harvey stood by the window in his corner office holding a cup of coffee as he stared down at the city. It was a warm summer day. Days like this made Harvey reminisce on things that should stay buried in the past. Sometimes if he squints he thinks he can see his old apartment from when he was kid even though he knows it was demolished. At least it should have been.

Every year around this time, Harvey always thought about searching for Mike. But he always convinced himself not to. It was a door that he didn’t want to open. He knew if he opened it, everything that he managed to keep hidden would come to the surface. He couldn’t let anyone else into his heart. It was still broken after all these years. Emotions made a person human; Harvey buried his. All he was was a broken heart in a hollow shell pretending to be a man. 

So he lived each day for his job at Pearson Hardman. The day that he accomplished his goal of becoming senior partner, he celebrated with a single-malt scotch, filet mignon, and a beautiful woman. It was completely opposite to his and Mike’s ritual. That was the only way Harvey could distinguish his two lives. Past Harvey celebrated with wine, steak, and Mike; present Harvey, didn’t celebrate with those things, he celebrated with scotch, filet mignon, and women. Past Harvey was human; Present Harvey was a shell. That explained why he still felt empty after celebrating.

“Harvey?” Donna asked closing the glass door silently. Harvey turned to her. “I’ve been calling you. Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” 

“Is it August 9 already?” 

Harvey raised his eyebrow over the edge of his coffee cup as he took a sip. It was cold. He could have sworn it was hot a second ago.

“Every year you stare out the window or in the case of the DA’s office you stared at the wall. It’s always around this time. I never asked what it was about. But for some reason you always wear blue even though blue is usually the color you wear to celebrate. And you wear your lavender shirt, which you only wear when something bad happened.” Donna said pointing at his shirt and tie. “So are you celebrating a death?”

“Don’t you have work or something? I swear I pay you to do something.”

“I just did my job.” Donna smirked. “Also, you have a phone call. A Miranda Ross, she said you’d know who she is.”

“That’s a name I haven’t heard in awhile.” Harvey said. He let go of the breath he didn’t realize he was holding once Donna left the room looking at him funny. For the first time he turned off the intercom before answering the phone. “Specter.”

“Hi…it’s um…Miranda Ross. My dad—“ A timid voice floated through the phone quietly.

“I know who…your dad?” Harvey looked up to see Donna quickly turning back to her work. He couldn’t help but to smile knowing the curiosity was eating at her.

“Mike Ross. He’s not really my dad; he’s my uncle. But since he raised me I call him dad.” Miranda said her voice growing more and more confident. It was weird knowing that this was the voice from the same baby from all those years ago. Clearly Mike was doing fine. “He’s actually the reason why I called. He doesn’t know though.”

“Is he hurt?”

“No nothing like that.” She paused. Harvey rested his forehead in his free hand waiting for her to explain. He could feel a headache coming on. “I’m afraid he’s going to do something stupid.”

“Stupid?” Harvey asked. “You are aware that he’s an adult. As long as it doesn’t break any laws he’s the maker of his consequences.”

“That’s the things, I’m pretty sure what he’s planning on doing is illegal. I over heard him talking with my uncle—“

“Uncle?” Harvey stomach sank already knowing what she was going to say. ‘So what he said was true,’ Harvey thought closing his eyes.

“Yeah, my Uncle Trevor, he’s my dad’s friend.” 

Harvey opened his eyes suddenly when she said Trevor was Mike’s friend. She didn’t say boyfriend, partner, or husband. She said friend. Harvey had to remind himself that that meant nothing since it has been 15 years. He looked back toward Donna frowning when he saw Jessica standing outside talking to Donna. From both women’s body language, Harvey knew neither one was pleased. 

“Mr. Specter, did you hear me?”

Startled, Harvey hadn’t realized that Miranda had continued talking. “Sorry can you repeat that?”

She sighed. “I said, I over heard my dad and my uncle talking about doing something. It was going to be one time, but the payout would be $25,000. Mr. Specter that’s the exact amount my dad needs.”

“For what?”

Miranda didn’t reply for a while. “Grammy. She needs to be moved to a different nursing home and her medical bills have been piling up. My dad didn’t want me to worry about it. But I know he’s struggling. We’re barely making ends meet to begin with.”

“If you want a loan go to the bank.”

“Mr. Specter, he already has. They denied him. I’m not asking for money. I just want you to stop him from doing something stupid.”

“What makes you think he’d listen to me? You know him better than I do. I haven’t spoken to him in—“

“I know 15 years. That’s how old I am. He left you shortly after I was born. It’s a pretty shitty feeling knowing that I’m the one who broke you two up.”

“It wasn’t you.”

“Well it sure as hell wasn’t some bullshit lie my dad told you.” Miranda said forcefully. “Look, Mr. Specter, he still cares about you. He has a scrapbook of you. It has every news article about you even the ones about you and the models. At first I kind of thought it was creepy until Uncle Trevor told me that my dad still loves you. It’s the kind of love that never goes away. I know you feel the same way.”

“Kid, I think you’ve seen too many romantic comedies.”

“You sound like a man who’s trying to convince himself of something he doesn’t believe in his heart.”

“ _Casablanca_. I see he still likes the classics.” Harvey smiles slightly despite himself. “Fine I’ll talk to him. But I’m not making any promises, kid.”

“That’s fine. But I just want the records to show that you didn’t deny it.” Miranda sang before hanging up. 

Mike definitely raised her.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harvey and Mike finally meet again after all these years.
> 
> And if I only could,
> 
> Make a deal with God,
> 
> And get him to swap our places,
> 
> Be running up that road,
> 
> Be running up that hill,
> 
> Be running up that building.
> 
> If I only could, oh...
> 
> You don't want to hurt me,
> 
> But see how deep the bullet lies.
> 
> Unaware that I'm tearing you asunder.
> 
> There is thunder in our hearts, baby.
> 
> So much hate for the ones we love?
> 
> Tell me, we both matter, don't we?
> 
>   
> "Running Up That Hill"- Placebo (Kate Bush Cover)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know much about records or jazz. Ray, Rachel and Louis make a cameo.  
> This chapter has some lines taken from the show and reworded, applied differently, or given to a different character. No copy right infringement is intended.  
> Also, I changed the rating to explicit because of the next chapter...

**Chapter 3**

  


Mike stepped around the precariously stack books until he reached the counter. He sighed thinking for probably the thousandth time that he should do something to get rid of some of the books. But he knew he wouldn’t. 

It was hard to believe that he and Miranda have been living above the Alcove bookstore for fifteen years already. Jenny, the owner and Trevor’s longtime girlfriend, didn’t charge him rent as long as he managed the bookstore. He was glad for that. 

“Hi, I was wondering if you could help me.” A woman with long wavy brown hair leaned on the counter. “My friends told me that you know like every book.”

“Most books. I have to have read it. What is the book about?” Mike asked. She was pretty, he noted. Even in the tight fitted pencil skirt. She explained a vague, but oddly specific summary of the basic plot of _Les Miserable._

“Wow you really do know every book.” She said smiling. “I’m Rachel.”

“It’s helpful to have an eidetic memory.” He replied making no attempt to flirt with her. “Do you want me to get the book?” She nodded

Stepping over the various stacks he found a copy of the book quickly and returned to the counter.  
He was looking at the ground focused on not tripping otherwise he would have run away.

“You really let this place go to shit, haven’t you?” Mike jumped at the voice knocking over a stack of books.

“Ms. Pearson.” Mike breathed out. She hadn’t changed since the first day he met her. She still managed to walk like she owned the goddamn place. “What are you doing here?”

She quirked an eyebrow up at the bigger mess Mike had caused. She handed him a vase of red roses. For the past fifteen years, she sent him the same intricately crafted glass vase and twelve long stem red roses as a reminder and a mockery. But this was the first time she ever hand delivered the flowers. “Remind me, what is our agreement?”

“You know what it is.” Mike gritted out. When she didn’t respond he continued. “Not to contact Harvey and you’ll make him name partner in fifteen years or less as long as he performed well. Not like you really had to compromise since you would have made him partner anyways.”

She smiled broadly. “Not like you would have contacted him either. But for such a super memory, you left out one part though. If you do contact him, I’d break you and then I’d break him.” She leaned closer and held her well manicured hand out like she was holding something. “I’ve got you and Harvey by the balls.”

Mike shifted his weight uncomfortably. “I never understood why you went to these lengths.”

“I need to protect my investments. Harvard wasn’t cheap you know. I’m sure you understand.” She replied simply. She straightened herself. “It’s come to my attention that your _daughter_ called Harvey.”

“If she did, then it was without my knowledge.” Mike said angrily dragging his fingers through his hair. “I never told anyone. I don’t know why she approached Harvey; I never told her about him. So, I don’t appreciate you coming here to remind of a fifteen year old deal that I didn’t break, but you’re about to; Harvey isn’t name partner yet.”

Jessica stared Mike in his eyes with an ever-present smirk like she knew something he didn’t.

“Shit, you’re worried that Harvey will find out and leave the firm.” The smirk quickly disappeared but it was still clear she was the one in charge of the conversation.

“Harvey finds out he will never practice law in New York again. I suggest you either leave New York like you should have from the beginning or you control your puppy.” Jessica said walking toward the exit. “Puppies need to be put in their place. You give them an inch they want a foot.”

“Always a pleasure talking to you.” Mike muttered. He clambered up the stairs in the back of the store to the apartment. 

It was amazing how much Miranda grew in fifteen years. It seemed like it was just yesterday Mike was holding her hoping for the fever to break as she whimpered. And it seemed like it was just yesterday Harvey held him as they watched her as she slept in the apartment for the first time. But now she lay sprawled on the couch with a book covering her face. For a niece she shared quite a few of his characteristics. 

“Hey kiddo.” Mike said softly shaking her ankle. No matter how old she was waking her was always a chore. “Hey.”

“Dad?” She made to rub her eyes causing the book to slip off her face. “What time is it?”

“A little after five. There’s something we need to talk about—“ Mike started but was cutoff when he heard the jangle of the store bell indicated someone came in. He swore at himself for letting Jessica rattle him so much that he forgot to lock up.

“Later?” Miranda asked. He nodded.

“Hi, welcome.” Mike called out walking down the stairs toward the customer. He stopped suddenly. Even under an expensive suit jacket, he’d recognize those broad shoulders. It was the same shoulders that supported him as he cried on them and the same shoulders he held onto for dear life. He wondered, despite himself, if Harvey still had the scratches on his back. 

Harvey turned toward the voice. He looked stunning in his three-piece suit and perfectly coiffed hair. Immaculate. Mike always figured he had a thing for suits (expensive, cheap it didn’t really matter). There was something about how people carried themselves while wearing one that went straight to Mike’s dick. It spoke of power, unbelievably sexy power. And Harvey wore his like he was made for it—all confidence, which was just on the right side of arrogance. It matched him perfectly. Mike quickly tried to think of anything to stop his cock from hardening. Mike tried to convince himself that it was the suit not Harvey standing in front of him after all these years that was affecting him.

‘There are lines around his eyes. Has he been getting enough sleep?’ Mike thought. ‘Not helping.’

“You’re the last person I thought I’d see.” Mike scoffed going behind the counter in some vain attempt at putting distance between them.

 

“Really? Is that necessary? Can’t we just talk?” Harvey asked putting his hand into his pocket pretending like he was in complete control. It was a strange feeling for him to be unsure of what to do exactly. A part of him wanted to treat Mike like he would with any other client—just get down to what the problem was and fix it swiftly and decisively. But another part, a larger part, wanted to yell at Mike for what he did. He took a deep breath trying to calm his nerves.

“I already told you what happened. I felt guilty, and after what happened with your mom—“ Mike started as he straightened some of the stacks of books on the counter just to keep his hands busy.

“Bullshit.” Harvey said looking Mike in the eyes. 

“What?”

“Bullshit.” He repeated. “I’ve always been able to read people. You know that, that’s why you left a note and had Grammy tell me. You never said anything to me. At the time I thought you were just too much of a pussy to say it to my face.” The color in Mike’s cheeks quickly drained. “Now seeing you, I realized it’s all a lie. It couldn’t have been that you didn’t want to raise Miranda either. Tell me the truth; I hate liars. What was it?”

Mike bit his lip remembering just how well Harvey knew him. In a small voice, Mike repeated, “I already told you.” 

Harvey sighed loudly. “Fine.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out his checkbook. “Do you have a pen?” Mike frowned at him confused, but still handed him a pen. Harvey leaned on the counter to write the check when a vase of roses caught his attention. He recognized the vase from a nearby florist. The florist was way too expensive for unemployed Trevor to afford. Against all better judgment Harvey reached for the card that was nestled in the roses. Mike gasped when he realized what Harvey had in his hands. “Are you sleeping with my boss?” Harvey held the card between his fingers with an unreadable expression on his face.

“It’s not like that.” Mike muttered. A deep flush was spreading from his neck to the tips of his ears.

“Then what is it? Because the way ‘I’m holding the balls’ sounds, it sounds like some kinky ass come on.” Harvey flicked the card at Mike’s chest. 

“Why do you always assume I’m fucking everyone? It’s like the park all over again.” Mike said darkly as he bent down to pick up the card. He refused to look at Harvey knowing there was going to be pain written on Harvey’s face. Even though Mike always told him he forgave him, and he did, it was still a sore spot for Harvey. It was a reminder of a time when Harvey almost screwed everything up. And Mike still knew exactly which buttons to press until it hurt.

Harvey took a breath before he calmly continued. “Just tell me exactly what is going on or I’m walk out the door.” 

“Well, I didn’t ask for your help, anyways.” Mike said defiantly. He held his head high staring at Harvey even though his vision was becoming blurry. “I didn’t ask you to come here with some pity handout.”

“No, but Miranda called me worried that Trevor might drag you into something you’ll regret.” Harvey straightened himself and smoothed the wrinkles from his suit. “So you have two options. Option A, you tell me what the fuck is going on and as payment I give you the $25,000 that you need or option B, you keep quiet and Grammy goes to the state facility. So which one do you pick?”

“Those aren’t my only options.” Mike said darkly. He realized that even though this man standing in front of him looked like Harvey, the Harvey that he knew would never have used Grammy like that. 

“Trust me they are.”

“When you have a gun to your head you’ve got a 146 other options.” Mike clenched his fists. Harvey whole demeanor softened minutely. “You’re the one who taught me that.”

“Mike, I can’t help you unless you tell me what’s going on.” Harvey said softly. He resisted the urge to reach out to touch Mike. “Let me help you.”

“It doesn’t matter. I made my choice and now I’m living with the consequences.”

>>>

In the end Mike refused to talk about it or take the check so Harvey left after telling Mike to be careful and not to do anything stupid. He didn’t have control over Mike. He never did. 

It was difficult returning to work knowing that Jessica had been in contact with Mike. As much as Harvey wanted to know what it was about, he knew he had to go about it strategically. It was Mike’s reaction that told Harvey that something else was going on. The card wasn’t an innuendo; it was a warning.

“Harvey, Jessica wants to see you.” Donna said sticking her head into his office. “By the way I heard about your little trip down to the Alcove bookstore.” Harvey barely raised his eyebrow in surprise at how Donna knew anything any more. “Rachel. She saw you walking toward the store, which is weird because Jessica had stopped by there as well. Harvey what’s going on? Was it just a coincidence that three people from this firm went to the same bookstore minutes after each other?”

Harvey shrugged his shoulder. Donna just confirmed what he already suspected. Jessica had said something that scared Mike. “Don’t know about Rachel, but Jessica and I had business to attend to.”

“Since when have we started representing small businesses?”

Harvey shot her look. “I’m going to see Jessica.” He said walking out of the office and headed for Jessica’s.

He entered the room seeing her sitting on her couch as she read over a file. 

“Sit.” She said without looking up. “Heard you went out for lunch.”

“Heard you did too.” Harvey decided that he wasn’t going to let on that he knew anything, which wasn’t too hard since he didn’t know much.

“Where did you go?” Jessica continued reading the file.

“The new diner a few street over.”

“Was it good?”

“Could have been better. The people weren’t particularly helpful, but the food was delicious.” Harvey unbuttoned his jacket before he sat across from Jessica. It was going to be a long meeting. “Where’d you go?”

“A little hole-in-the-wall with an unimpressive name and equally unimpressive inside.” Jessica responded finally setting the file on the side. She had an impressive stony look that didn’t give anything away. 

Harvey wasn’t sure of what to make of the comment. Was she intentionally saying it or just commenting on the store? For that matter, why hide the fact that she went to the bookstore?

“I get the feeling you didn’t want to just talk about our lunch breaks.”

“You have interviews with the Harvard law students in a week.” Jessica said.

“Interviews?” Harvey frowned. 

“Harvey don’t you read the memos I sent you?”

“You mean the one’s titled ‘interview candidates read now?’” Harvey asked. “You were serious?”

“All senior partners get an associate.”

“I don’t need one. I work best alone. Plus, the last one was terrible.”

“You picked him.”

“That was before I realized he could talk.”

“Let me put it this way. You are going to the interviews and getting a new associate.”

“But I don’t want a puppy.”

“Any one else would be dying for this opportunity. Find me an associate just like you, but less of a pain in the ass.”

“Impossible. There’s no one like me.” Harvey replied, standing up and buttoning his jacket. “By the way, all lawyers are a pain in the ass. Some are just better at it than others.” He headed for the door before turning around. “See that’s funny because…”

“Get out.”

>>>

The following day Harvey put on his suit, combed his hair, and accepted the newspaper and coffee that Ray handed him. It was normal day. He was going to forget ever seeing Mike Ross. As they slowly drove down the busy New York streets Harvey watched the buildings go by. He remembered exploring the streets late at night holding Mike’s hand. Back then life was simple—his life was Mike. He was sure the alley where Mike gave him a blowjob was nearby. That’s when he saw it, the small wooden plaque jutting from the wall above the door and the large bay windows.

“Ray, pull over.” Harvey said suddenly realizing how close Mike had ben this entire time.

“Sir?”

Harvey wasn’t even sure why he had Ray stop, it wasn’t like he intended to go inside and see Mike again. He said everything he could. If Mike was going to do something stupid then it was his own doing. But he looked up into the second floor windows and could just make out Mike’s head talking to a girl, who he could only assume was Miranda. She nodded before disappearing. Moment later she reemerged on the side of the building staring at Harvey’s black town car. Harvey watched her bite her lip and look back up at the apartment, probably unsure if today was the day Mike intended to do the job.

She had her dad’s dirty blonde hair, but her mom’s soft waves that she had twisted into a messy bun. She looked like a typical punk kid. A plaid shirt was thrown over an old Queen shirt that Harvey recognized as Mike’s from the time Mike forced him to go to a Queen concert. A pair of black combat boots was laced up over there form fitting jeans. Harvey rolled his eyes unable to believe that Mike let her go out like that. She should be thinking about the way she wanted to present herself. 

Then she did something he never imagined she would do. She fisted her hands and marched over to his car. Before he could tell Ray to go, she pounded on the window. He caught Ray’s worried glances in the rearview mirror. Harvey shook his head.

It was her eyes that made Harvey roll down the window. Underneath all the dark eyeliner, she had the Ross’s blue eyes, clear, sparkling eyes. Mike’s eyes. “You’ve got guts kid. I could be a murderer.”

“Who the fuck are you?” Miranda said angrily ignoring what he said. “Trevor doesn’t live here anymore.”

Harvey’s chest felt uncomfortably at the thought that Trevor used to living with Mike. “Harvey Specter.”

She blinked several times until the look of recognition washed over her face. “You look old…older than in the pictures.”

“Nice save kid.”

“It’s Miranda.”

“I know.”

She looked back up at the apartment. “Did you talk to my dad? He’s been acting weird since yesterday.”

“That’s a long story.” Harvey looked at his watch. He was going to be late, well later than usual. “I have to get to work. Do you want a ride anywhere?”

“My dad told me not to take ride from strangers.”

“Probably smart.”

“But you’re not really a stranger, are you?”

Harvey shrugged and opened the door.

“I’m going to the St. Ann Senior Home to see Grammy.” Miranda replied sliding into the car.

“Ray, my driver, will drop me off at the office then he can take you there.” 

The car ride was filled with small talk. Harvey asked her what school she went to (Jackson High School), how her grades were (4.0), what her favorite subject was (science and math), and if she played any sports (soccer and softball). Harvey smiled and nodded at all of the right places. 

‘Is small talk always this painful?’ Harvey thought. He had no idea how to talk to a teenager when all he wanted to ask was how Mike was. 

When Ray pulled over outside of the Pearson Hardman building Harvey handed Miranda his business card. “Swing by later and we can talk. Don’t tell Grammy about seeing me. I have a feeling she hates me, and you don’t need to get dragged into that.”

“Hey, Mr. Specter.”

“Harvey.”

“Harvey thanks.” Miranda said shutting the door.

>>>

It was nearly five in the afternoon by the time Miranda approached Harvey’s office. To say she was nervous undermined everything. She was scared. 

She was five when she found Mike’s scrapbook in the nightstand. Granted she didn’t understand what the news clippings said and laughed at the picture of the man in the article. His hair looked funny. But he was beautiful and she was in love. When she was old enough to understand the articles, she thought it was creepy that Mike dedicated a scrapbook to this man. But something about the way each article was carefully clipped and taped into the book spoke clearly of the amount of love Mike held him. As she got older it became a habit to check every month for any additions. She discreetly helped Mike. Whenever she read the newspaper, she was careful to fold the newspaper back up nicely so as to not damage a hidden Harvey Specter article. 

She never understood what was so special about Harvey. It wasn’t even like the guy was an actor or a musician either; he was a lawyer. As far as she knew, Mike never wanted to be a lawyer. Sometimes she would see articles of Harvey with a new model, actress, or some woman equally glamorous in the newspaper. To her surprise, Mike always included them into the scrapbook with the same amount of care. He didn’t even fold the picture over to hide the woman’s face. Miranda couldn’t understand why Mike was so obsessed with this man. 

But she continued to check the scrapbook every month. Until a few months ago. At the end of the book there were several pages dedicated to old Polaroid pictures and glossy photos. Each photo contained a young Mike and a younger version of the guy in the book. Under the photos, in Mike’s usual scrawl, were dates and locations. Harvey’s eyes were softer then; they weren’t as hard and calculating as they were in more recent photos. Mike changed too. He lost the youthful innocence he had in the photos.

The one thing Miranda never did was talk to Mike about this Harvey Specter. She figured that he would tell her. But he never did. So the next time Uncle Trevor came over she asked him about the guy. That’s when she found out how much they had been in love. And how Mike clearly was still in love with him.

There was one photo that Miranda liked in particular. It was the last one, labeled Coney Island Pier, July 4, 1999. Barely a month before she was born. The people surrounding the couple were admiring the orangey-pink sky as the sun set on the pier, but not Mike and Harvey. They were sitting on a bench looking at each other. Mike had a smile plastered on his face; Harvey had a smile that reached his eyes. Sometimes, she thought she could hear him laughing. Uncle Trevor had walked in on Miranda once watching her fingers trace the photo. He said, that looks were deceiving; it wasn’t as romantic as it looked. Apparently Mike had told Harvey that Miranda, her mom, was the beached whale a few hundred feet away. Grammy had called him earlier to say that Miranda was so pregnant that Sam had to roll her out of bed. Miranda could see how much they loved each other. Even though Uncle Trevor kept insisting that she wasn’t the one who broke them up, she knew she had to do something to fix it.

So Miranda stood outside of Harvey’s office too nervous to walk in. It was easy pretending to be tough. She did it so Mike wouldn’t worry about her. He had too much on his mind already. But there was something about Harvey; she knew he would be able to see past her charade. Even then that wasn’t what she was worried about. She was scared of finding out that the man Mike was in love with wasn’t sitting in that office any more. Her birth was a tragedy she didn’t want to be the cause of another.

“You can go in you know. He’s been expecting you.” Donna said looking at her. “Didn’t tell me who are though. Just told me to let in a punk-ass looking girl.”

Miranda smirked. “Thanks.”

Her confidence returned as she took a step into uncertainty. 

>>>

Even though Harvey told Donna to let Miranda in, if and when she arrived, he was nervous. Harvey Specter did not get nervous. He made others nervous. But here he was basically shaking in his designer shoes. In the car ride, he wanted to ask her if Mike had spoken of him. If Mike had told her that he wanted to be there for her. Harvey wanted her to know that he was willing to do everything for her. Something Present Harvey would never have even considered. But Past Harvey would have done anything for her and Mike. She had to know.

“She’s here.” Donna’s voice came through the intercom. “And for the record you’re telling me who she is when she leaves. She’s young enough to be your kid. Oh my god—“

“Thank you Donna. You can send her in.” Harvey said before clicking the intercom off. Second time, he noted.

“I wasn’t sure if you would come.” He said when Miranda walked in. 

She shrugged walking straight toward his record collection. “Awesome.”

“You like records?”

“Yeah. The sound quality is better than MP3s and there’s something about hearing the scratching of the needle on the record. It gives it a character that modern music technology can’t get. Plus, jazz sounds better on a record player.” She replied leafing through the records. “The Spinners?”

“They were a defining pop band of their time.”

“Yeah, like One Direction or Taylor Swift.” Miranda replied wandering off to Harvey’s sports collection. “Did you play?” 

“I was a pitcher in high school. Threw out my shoulder with a pitch so I missed the championship game.”

“Who won?”

“We did.” Harvey replied. It wasn’t a happy memory to revisit. That day he sat, his arm in a sling, in the overcrowded bleachers with Mike and watched as his team celebrated winning the game. He was happy for them. But it also meant that he was replaceable. As if reading his mind, Mike whispered into his ear _You’re not replaceable. Especially not your cock._ Suddenly his jeans had started to feel tight as Mike dragged him down to the equipment room to give him a blowjob. Regardless of the game, Harvey still came out on top that day.

“Over compensating?” She asked waving to all of the different balls, drawing Harvey back from the memory just in time before he had a repeat of that day in front of Miranda.

“Don’t touch those.”

“Got it. Don’t touch your balls.”

“You’re just like your father.”

“Which one?”

Harvey looked away.

“Don’t worry about it. I never knew him or my mom. Dad talks about them sometimes though. When I was old enough to understand, he sat me down and told me what happened. He even told me that it would be okay not to call him dad. But what would I call him instead? You know? He raised me. He’s the one who taught me everything I know, especially how to find good music.”

“Your attire says otherwise.” Harvey made a show of looking at Miranda’s outfit.

She laughed. “Well I can’t exactly go to school in suit. And if I went to the nursing home in one they’d all think there’s a funeral and probably have a heart attack.”

Harvey agreed. “How has Mike been?” Harvey got up and walked to his records. He chose a Charles Bradley album to put on before he sat down at the couch. 

Miranda sat across from him buying time. “He’s fine. I mean, I guess, I don’t really have anything else to compare him to.”

Harvey leaned back. “He hasn’t changed much since then. He just grew up. Did he finish college?”

She shook her head. “I think he wanted to, but with all the hospital bills, Dad figured it was for the best if he got a job. So Jenny hired him to manage the bookstore during the day, she lets us live in the apartment for free. At night he works at a coffee shop.”

“Two menial jobs?” Harvey was surprised. Mike wasn’t exactly an overachiever growing up he had a tendency to leave people feeling underwhelmed by his intelligence. He never really had goals; he just went with the flow of the world. Seems like Adult Mike wasn’t any better.

“Hey. Not everyone can be a lawyer. Plus, he needed a job that was going to be flexible with the hours because, you know, raising a kid by himself.” Miranda said pointing a finger at Harvey.

“Yeah I know.” Harvey rested his chin on his fingers. “But don’t put all the blame on me. I wanted to be there. I told Mike that I was going to postpone Harvard.”

“You honestly thought he would agree? You must think I’m an idiot. You got to Harvard and realized that being gay was just a phase for you.”

“Miranda, sit down, and let me explain.” Harvey said with surprising calm. “We were going to try to make things work. Miranda, believe me when I say that I wanted to be there for you. I did love Mike back then. But sometimes things happen.”

“Then what happened?” Miranda flopped back into her seat.

“I was going to be a paralegal to support us while Mike finished his degree. I turned in my two-weeks notice.” Harvey said pointedly. “Then one day he was gone. He told me that he had been sleeping with Trevor.”

She stared at him in a way that reminded him of when Mike’s sister used to stare at him as she tried to weasel out the last of his information. “You’re lying. He wouldn’t. Uncle Trevor told me the most they ever did was make out back in middle school.”

Harvey shrugged. After seeing Mike the other day, he figured that Mike had lied. He was still trying to figure out why. “It’s what he told me. At the time I believed him.”

“He told you that lie to hurt you.” Miranda whispered. 

Even if it was the truth, Harvey refused to agree that anything could hurt him. He had spent the last fifteen years carefully crafting a wall around him to avoid getting hurt again. When he got to his Harvard apartment the first thing he noticed were the walls. When he was tired or drunk he’d ask Mike to tell him make up a story about the crack above the toilet that looks like Sean Connery. It was always met with silence. The walls didn’t have any characters; they were just cracks. For the next three years he jerked around to avoid the silence that filled his empty apartment. He only dated women because they could never be Mike. No one ever could. 

“When I found out who and what you were exactly to my dad, I talked to Uncle Trevor about you. He told me that the love my dad still has for you is unique. It’s the reason why he doesn’t date anyone because everyone else would always come in second to the Great Harvey Specter. I grew up hoping I could find someone like that.” Miranda smiled softly. “I wish you two could make up or something. If you still care about him, that is.”

No matter what, even after what was said all those years ago, Harvey still cared. He never stopped loving Mike. He never could.

“This morning you said he’s been acting weird.” Harvey said changing the subject. 

“Oh that.” Miranda rubbed the back of her neck. Harvey raised his eyebrow at her indicated his growing annoyance. “I dunno how to explain it. Usually I know what he’s thinking. But lately there have been all of these secret meetings with Uncle Trevor. He was about to tell me something yesterday, but then someone came into the store and he didn’t want to talk about it afterwards. I don’t know what he’s thinking anymore. It’s more than just the money. There’s something else.” She paused, looking down at the floor, she continued. “I’m scared.”

“All I know is that something is going on with my boss. I don’t know what it is.” Harvey answered.

“Is it about the flowers? He gets them every year around this time. He always throws them away. Once he caught me taking the flowers out of the trash. I really liked the vase and I never received flowers. I was a kid…I was in elementary.” Miranda added when Harvey smiled at her cheekily. “Anyway, he got so mad that every year since then he smashes the vase and practically destroys the flowers.”

Harvey scoffed. It was easy to imagine the look on Mike’s face when he saw Miranda with the face. Mouth hanging open, eyes wide, as he pointed back and forth between the vase and Miranda before stammering some sort of reprimand.

Suddenly the door flew open startling Miranda, but barely gaining a reaction from Harvey.

“What is this? New client meeting? Is it for that bookstore case?” Louis said standing with his hands on his hips. “Jessica said that you met with a client over lunch the other day. In this economy, that store is barely staying afloat.” He turned to look at a still very startled Miranda. “Whoa. Is she even legal? You need to tone down the pimp persona.”

“But your wife is the one who picked out the suit this morning.” Harvey stood, slowly buttoning his jacket and smoothing out the wrinkles. 

“I don’t have a wife, douche.”

“Really? Didn’t know that.” Harvey responded smoothly. “What do you want Louis? I’m in a meeting.”

“With a kid. Kids aren’t billable. Or…is Harvey Specter doing pro bono?”

“Harvey, I’m sorry.” Donna said walking into the room. “He waited until I went to the bathroom. What kind of person does that?” Her face contorting as fake tears slid down her face. “No one is supposed to get past me. Harvey’s probably going to fire me now.”

“Oh no, no, no.” Louis held his hands up trying to placate her without touching her. “If he fires you, you can work for me.” Donna wailed even louder. “Oh god, I’m sorry, I have to…what’s that? You need me?” Louis turned his head to an imaginary person in the hallway before swiftly walking out.

“You owe big time.” Donna said composing herself once Louis was out of sight. “And I’m not talking about Hermes or new Louboutins. I’m talking huge. I’m sure you’ll be able to figure out some way to thank me.” She winked before going back to her desk.

“You’re getting dirt on the leather.” Harvey looked at Miranda who had her boots on the cushion throughout the entire intrusion. Even though she acted like the mature adult at times, he was reminded that she was still fifteen. “He’s harmless. Don’t worry.”

“Are you…” Miranda slowly unfolded herself. While they were talking she could have sworn she saw a little of the Harvey from the photos. But once Louis came in, the lawyer persona slid so effortlessly back into place. Then the way he talked with Donna. She knew a sexual innuendo when it was in front of her. “Never mind.”

“Donna’s my legal assistant and best friend.” Harvey said sensing the questions she wanted to ask. “We’re not going out, and I’m not a pimp.”

She nodded and looked at cuff watch. “He’s going to start wondering where I am.”

“Do you need a ride?” Harvey asked frowning. He was more than a little disappointed that because of Louis his talk with Miranda was cut short.

“It’s not far.” She shook her head. “Uncle Trevor told me stories about you. Said you’re the overprotective type.” She shrugged then casually said, “I might accidentally call you dad.”

“It wouldn’t be the end of the world.” Harvey replied. “Just not daddy.”

“See ya later Harvey. Thanks for you know talking with me. Your fee must be enormous.” Harvey smirked knowing she probably wouldn’t even be able to guess it correctly. “Thanks for trying.”

Donna wasted no time after Miranda left to barrage Harvey questions about who the mystery teen was. So, to make up with Donna, Harvey took her out to dinner and explained everything to her…well almost everything.

“Wait, Miranda Ross? As in the person who called earlier this week.” Donna asked. She put her fork down and took a sip of wine. 

Harvey nodded swirling the glass of scotch.

“When I told Jessica who you were on the phone with. Stop glaring, it was before all of this, and I thought she was a client. Anyway when I told her, her face turned cold. Colder than I’ve ever seen it.” Donna explained. She didn’t want to admit it, but that was the first time she was terrified of Jessica.

“It just proves that she’s involved some how.” Harvey gulped down the rest of the scotch. In hindsight he probably should have known something was going to break when he was drinking celebratory scotch with his apology dinner.

It only took a week for everything to fall apart.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> But I'm only human
> 
> And I bleed when I fall down
> 
> I'm only human
> 
> And I crash and I break down
> 
> Your words in my head, knives in my heart
> 
> You build me up and then I fall apart
> 
> 'Cause I'm only human
> 
> I can turn it on
> 
> Be a good machine
> 
> I can hold the weight of worlds
> 
> If that's what you need
> 
> Be your everything
> 
>   
> 
> 
> “Human” – Christina Perri

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and leaving kudos! Love you guys.
> 
> I added new tags so read the new tags as a warning. There will be some sexual content. It's my first time writing a smut piece soooo sorry? I tried. Let me know if you think there should be more tags.
> 
> If the end seems like it was left hanging it's intentional but not really. Originally the chapter was going to include parts of the next chapter but it was going to be quite long.
> 
> This story will probably take 2 more chapters and maybe an epilogue to end.

**Chapter 4**

Mike straightened his tie and took a deep breath. He stared at the man shaking wearing an ill-fitted suit in the mirror. Anxiously biting his lip, he thought about how he got to this point. A part of him kept telling him that he should have taken the money Harvey offered. He knew if he called Harvey, the offer would still be on the table. He just had to tell Harvey everything and he’d get the money for Grammy. But he couldn’t. It meant being connected to Harvey again. Being connected to that man meant falling in love again. The power Harvey still had over him scared him. That day he had been ready to say everything if it meant being in arms again. But that wasn’t an option any more. There were people, including Harvey, which he needed to protect. So he had to do this. He reminded himself that he was doing this for his family. With one last look in the mirror, he walked out into Trevor’s living room. 

“Don’t worry. It’s simple; all you have to do is go to the Chilton and make the drop at the room.” Trevor said smiling. He patted Mike on the shoulders supportively. “Just make sure you switch briefcases with the correct people. You can do it.”

“Why can’t you do this and just give me the money?”

“Because I have another meeting to go to, and this guy is only going to be here today. Don’t worry. After the drop just come back here and wait for me. Then I’ll take you to dinner. You’ve got this.”

Mike nodded. It was hard to believe that he was actually going to deal drugs. When did he fall this far down the rabbit hole? Trevor gave him money for the cab saying something like he couldn’t arrive at the Chilton on a bike. He couldn’t hear over the pounding in his head.

Mike stood in the lobby at the Chilton steeling himself up for what will probably be the biggest mistake of his life, bigger than signing a deal with the devil. And of course, as if some cosmic joke, Mike saw the sign indicating the room number for the Pearson Hardman junior associate interview. All he could do was laugh at the cruel joke. He made a note of which room to avoid in case he ran into the devil herself. This time she’d collect.

“For family.” He mumbled to himself as he stepped into the elevator. On top of avoiding getting arrested or killed, now I have to avoid her, Mike thought resting his head on the back of the elevator. 

It seemed like the elevator ride took longer than usual. The oxygen seemed to be leaving the building the farther up he went. Mike loosened his tie he tried to remember how to breathe. He was sure someone was going to hear the drums pounding in his ears or see the sweat building on his brow and know why he was here.

As Mike drew closer to the room he noticed a well-dressed man talking to a bellhop outside of the room he was supposed to make the drop. Were they the ones Trevor told him about? Something seemed off. The bellhop seemed too friendly with the other man. But Mike couldn’t turn back so he kept going forward. 

“Excuse me, I was thinking about going to the pool.” Mike asked. “Is it nice?”

“Yes. We pride ourselves in our amenities.” The bellhop replied. The closed pool signed flashed through Mike’s mind signaling something was definitely wrong. 

“Oh and what time is it? My watch broke.” 

“It’s 10.” The other guy said. As he lifted his wrist, pulling his sleeve up, Mike saw the gun tucking in its holster. 

“Thanks.” Tightening his grip on the briefcase, Mike calmly walked to the stairway ignoring the burning desire to run and look behind. Once in the stairway he flew down the stairs. By the time he was two-flights down he heard the door above him burst open. Thinking quickly he threw open the door racing down to the Pearson Hardman interview area. He didn’t want to be there, but it was better than wherever he would go if he got caught.

When Mike finally stopped running he was out of breath frantically looking around trying to see if he really lost the guys.

“Mr. Sorkin? You’re five minutes late. Why should I let you?” A red head said behind a desk. Mike looked around at several people wearing suits. They all stared at his sweat-covered face like sharks in a school of fish. They looked at him like they knew he was the weakest. Harvard douches.

“I’m just trying to lose the cops. I don’t really care. Personally I don’t really want to work for Pearson Hardman so I don’t care if you let me in or not.” Mike said. He turned his back to the open door to face the hallway wondering if the cops were going to pop up. So he didn’t see the woman look at the man in the adjacent room sitting behind a computer and wink at him. If had, he would have run. He would rather have the police catch him than go into that room.

“You may go in.” She said smiling.

“What?” Mike asked not paying attention to what the lady said, but she was gesturing to the open doors. It had to be better than staying out in the open, so Mike entered the adjacent room.

“Mr. Sorkin you’re late. I don’t care if my assistant thinks you’re interesting. Are you purposely wasting my time?” Mike froze instantly recognizing that voice. It was the same one that came to the store.

“Harvey?” Mike said barely audible. Harvey looked up from his computer meeting Mike’s eyes in surprise. Since, apparently the universe was against him the briefcase popped open spilling the bags of weed. “Shit.”

Whoa was the only thing Harvey could say. He walked over to Mike looking at the bags. “She wasn’t kidding when she said you were going to do something stupid.”

“What are you talking about?” Mike said frustrated he shoved the weed back into the briefcase. A strong, warm tingle shot through Harvey seeing Mike on his knees in front of him. He wet his lip thinking about what Mike could do in that position. What he has done. The tingle settled in his groin. Suddenly becoming aware at how tight his pants were becoming, Harvey shook his head trying to forget those thoughts.

“Mike.” Harvey placed his hand on Mike’s shaking ones. “Miranda’s been calling me everyday saying how agitated you’ve been lately. She’s scared that you were going to do something you’d regret.”

Mike bit his lip trying to stop the tears from building up. He had hoped that Miranda wouldn’t find out. He thought he made sure she never saw the bills or the almost perpetual red in his checkbook. He didn’t want her to worry about their money problems. So he put on a brave face for her. But thinking back on it, Mike realized that she stopped asking for birthday or Christmas presents years ago. At the time she told him that all she would have asked for was a book and seeing as they live above a bookstore she had everything she wanted. He never questioned it. But now hearing Harvey, he realized that she had known about the problems even though he was the one who was supposed to provide for them both. That was the promise he made to Grammy and to his sister’s grave. She was going to be taken care of. He was the parent; she shouldn’t be the one to worry about him. It was just another thing that he was failing at.

“Is that why you came by offering me money?” 

Harvey nodded. “Miranda told me about your money problems.”

Irrationally, Mike had hoped that there was more to the visit. It was stupid, he knew, but he couldn’t help it. 

Mike looked away. “It’s just a one time thing.” 

“And the next time Grammy needs an increase in medical care or Miranda gets hurt, what are you going to do? Sell meth?” Harvey said. He massaged his temples trying to calm his anger.

“Now you think I’m some sort of drug dealer?” Mike said loudly. “I’m not Walter White.”

“Keep your voice down. You don’t need to yell.” Harvey covered Mike’s mouth. “Why’d you come here anyways?” Harvey relished in the feeling of having Mike’s warm skin in hands again for probably longer than appropriate before moving it away.

“It’s not like I did it on purpose. I didn’t know that you were going to be here.” Mike said glumly. He went through all of this and he wasn’t going to get the money that he needed. He almost wished Jessica were here instead because then at least he would be talking to Harvey. “I was trying to ditch the police. The drop was a set up.”

“Come sit down.” Harvey indicated to one of the chairs at the desk. “We might as well talk while you wait out the police.” Mike shrugged indicating that he probably wasn’t to answer Harvey’s questions. “Did Trevor put you up to this?”

“Contrary to what you may believe about Trevor, he didn’t make me do anything.”

Harvey scoffed. “Since you guys were kids if he asked you do something you’d do it.”

Mike rolled his eyes. “Still jealous of him?”

“That douche? You should have dropped him back in high school. He’s just holding you back.”

“Like I was?” Mike mumbled slumping in the chair. This wasn’t the first time he had seen the parallels between his relationship with Harvey and his friendship with Trevor. Since they were kids, people have always told Mike that Trevor was going to hold him back. Like if Trevor didn’t get him to sell the exam answers, he would have finished college or gotten a better job. But they forget that none of that would have saved his sister’s life. Everything he’d done, he would have done even without Trevor because another living being needed him. 

“What are you talking about?” Harvey frowned. “I never said you were holding me back.”

Mike clicked his tongue turning his head away. He pressed his lips together tightly when he realized how close he was to telling Harvey everything. He wasn’t even sure if Jessica would accept this meeting as pure happenstance. She’d probably think he was trying to sabotage the interviews.

“What did Jessica tell you?” One look at Mike, and Harvey knew he was on the right track. Jessica had said something to Mike that scared him years ago. He needed to know what it was. 

Mike looked at him with wide eyes realizing that Harvey must have figured something out. Knowing Harvey, he wouldn’t rest until he found out the truth. If the truth came out…Mike shivered. Harvey would hate him even more. Mike closed his eyes, anxiously worrying his lip, willing the room away he started reciting the BarBri handbook in his head. Recognizing the signs that Mike was retreating into his mind (this part of Mike never changed), Harvey stood and moved so that he was in front of Mike. 

“Hey.” Harvey leaned against the desk. He tilted Mike’s head up toward him caressing his cheek. “Please don’t shut me out any more. Fifteen years is long enough.” Harvey wiped away the tear that rolled down Mike’s cheek. “Don’t you think you’ve punished yourself enough? Me enough?” Harvey pressed a chaste kiss to Mike’s cheek feeling them tremble as Mike mouthed silent words. When Mike still didn’t respond he moved his hand to the back of Mike’s neck as he kissed his forehead. “I’ve had enough.”

Startled by the hand and the sudden confession, Mike pushed back away from Harvey staring wide-eyed at him.

“There we go; there’s those pretty blues.” Harvey smiled cheekily. “But I have had enough. I’m tired of pretending that I stopped loving you. I never have and never will. Whatever Jessica promised you, it’s not worth it.”

It happened mostly at night. When he was alone and he could let his defenses down, he thought about what kind of man Mike became and what kind of girl Miranda grew up to become. The one thing he never allowed himself to think about was why Mike left because he didn’t, he couldn’t go into that darkness. But as the years went on, and it became apparent that it wasn’t a dream, Harvey’s thoughts about the blue eyes became more infrequent. But when he had them, they were all consuming and demanded his attention. He’d be left staring out the window remembering, wondering what went wrong, what could he have done to fix it, was there anything to fix, why Trevor? 

It was true, Harvey never got over him. Sure he went out on dates frequently and more times than not sex was involved. But Harvey Specter didn’t do relationships because he was in a fifteen-year relationship with a ghost. Relationships meant emotions, which meant vulnerability, which meant being human. 

But then the ghost came back into his life again leaving Harvey, for the first time in a long time, wanting to be human. 

Harvey’s words pulled Mike back to the room slowly focusing him like the lens on a camera on what was said. Harvey still loved him. That was one thought Mike could never entertain. It was the one possibility that would break his resolves and search for Harvey. Mike wrung his hands while he thought of what to say. It didn’t matter what he said anymore. He already broke the condition. After all this time, how could she break him down any further? Through Harvey, Mike suddenly realized. His weakness has always been Harvey, and she knew it. Harvey finally was getting everything he deserved; he was New York’s best goddamn closer. That was all Mike ever wanted. If he talked, she would tear Harvey apart starting with his reputation. So he’ll protect Harvey’s slice of happiness at whatever the cost.

“I can’t.” Mike whispered. “Please.” He pleaded with Harvey not to make him explain. Maybe he’ll leave New York like she wanted, and maybe she’ll let Harvey stay. 

Harvey nodded, sighing heavily. He walked to the wet bar pouring both of them scotch. Placing one glass in front of Mike, Harvey leaned on the edge of the desk near him. Taking a deep breath, he put his lawyer mask back on. It was clearly what Mike wanted. This was just another professional meeting. It was the only way he was going to be able to talk to Mike without getting emotional. Emotions made him vulnerable; he couldn’t risk being vulnerable. 

“Miranda told me you’re working two jobs.”

Mike stared at the glass Harvey offered him. It confused Mike. Scotch had always been their form of a peace offering. Was Harvey apologizing? Looking up at Harvey, Mike saw that his eyes held the same distant gaze he had noticed in recent pictures of Harvey. It was the same look Harvey gave him in the park when they were younger. The walls had come up again. Only this time Mike was the reason for the look. It wasn’t an apology; it was just scotch. Mike bit the inside of his cheek realizing that he was the cause of this colder Harvey. Harvey had given him the chance to talk; maybe they could have been able to salvage whatever was left, but not any more. 

“I like the work and the pay is good.” Mike said taking several gulps of the scotch.

“Slow down kid; it’s not water.” Harvey said placing his hand on top of the glass before Mike could take another drink.

“I know; it’s scotch.” Mike crossed his arms and furrowed his eyebrows. As if realizing that he looked like a petulant child he uncrossed his arms. “I’m not a kid. I’m only a year younger than you.”

“You’re still younger.” Harvey shrugged playfully. “I see you’ve been turning Miranda into a movie buff. She quoted a line from Casablanca to me the first time we spoke.”

Mike chuckled. “That’s her favorite movie. I can’t believe she called you.”

“She was worried.” Harvey took another sip. He watched Mike carefully seeing if the conversation was venturing too far into an apparently taboo area. 

“I’m her dad; she shouldn’t be the worrying about me.” Mike frowned into his glass. 

“I have a feeling she’s the more responsible one out of the two of you.” Harvey chuckled. “She’s not the one who came in here with a briefcase full of pot.” Harvey looked at the case that was sitting next to Mike’s chair.

Mike stuck his tongue out at him. “It’s not like I planned for it to happen. Trevor said it was supposed to be simple: I go in, exchange the briefcases and I get the hell out of dodge.”

“Except he didn’t tell you about the police.” Harvey wanted to say more, but from Mike’s darken expression he knew he was walking on a thin line already. He decided it best to change the subject. “What else have you been up to?”

“I passed the LSAT with a Harvard worthy score. Blew your score out of the water.” Mike said. He held his glass up for Harvey to pour more scotch.

Harvey always knew that Mike could pass the LSAT. When he was preparing for his own LSAT, they often quizzed each other formulating hypothetical scenarios and such. So it was never a question on _could_ Mike pass it was always _when_. But that was Mike. He had all of this potential, but a foot out the door, ready to run. It was like he was afraid to commit to something in case it didn’t work out. The only times Harvey ever saw Mike do anything that required him using everything he had was when it dealt with his family and at one point Harvey. Once Harvey did bring it up, Mike just shrugged saying that things can be taken away and given a value in an instant. And in that instant you realize just how little everything meant. So he chose to live with the lowest expectations because when it came crashing down he couldn’t get hurt; he could only be impressed. Harvey knew Mike had been talking about his parents and the expulsion. Afterwards Harvey promised Mike that they would conquer the world together. Another broken promise. 

“Impressive. Why do I sense a but?”

“It was for someone else. The person was smart, but choked on exams.” Mike made a show of taking a small sip to Harvey, earning an eye roll.

“Hope they’re not at my firm.” 

Mike shrugged. “Don’t know. I passed the Bar as well.”

“How’d that happen?”

“Some douche bet me that I couldn’t pass without going to law school.” Mike smirked remembering that day. He got $2,000 out of that bet. It was the easiest money he ever earned and the easiest spent. Miranda had to go to the doctors for a severe ear infection a week later. “I even took the GRE a few times. One was for a future teacher. Made sure that Miranda never got that teacher.”

“I’m glad.” Harvey said tilting his glass to Mike as an informal toast. “Why’d you stop? I’m assuming you stopped since…” Harvey gestured to the case again. 

“One of the proctors recognized me. I realized I took one too many exams.” Mike replied. “So after that I took over Jenny’s bookstore as manager and got another job. Miranda was three by then. I tried not to rely on Grammy, you know let the old woman enjoy her retirement.”

Chuckling, Harvey asked, “How is she?”

“Fine, convinced the nursing home is trying to kill her.” Mike said looking into his glass. “Ah, she’s not serious. It’s a joke.”

“I can give you the money to help her. She was practically my grandmother too.” Harvey said. Sure he did want to help Grammy, but Harvey knew if Mike needed money he would have helped anyways. 

Mike mulled on the offer. “Thanks. I don’t really have many other options. The nursing home wants the money in a few days. I’ll pay you back.”

Harvey shrugged his shoulders knowing how difficult it was for Mike to accept handouts. He had has been the type to want to work for everything he got, which was why he didn’t have much. “Whenever. But the interest rate is high.”

“Ass.” Mike shook his head. “What has Harvey Specter been up to?”

“How much do you know already? Miranda told me about the scrapbook.” Harvey cocked his eyebrow smirking.

“Shit, I didn’t think she knew about that. I’m going to kill her.” Mike gritted out. 

He never intended to start the scrapbook. It just sort of happened. He saw Harvey’s name in the newspaper about a young lawyer at the DA’s office was taking putting criminals away faster than anyone else before. Before Mike knew it he was collecting every article about Harvey. At first he kept all of the articles in a box on the top shelf of his closet not wanting to be tempted. But the more it seemed like his life was falling apart the more he found himself rereading the articles and staring at the photos. It was calming knowing that at least Harvey was succeeding. Soon enough the box was moved into his nightstand. Then with the photos of them together, they were moved into the photo album. He always shut his door before looking at the photos, not because he didn’t want Miranda to know, but because it felt like he was spending time with Harvey. He knew how crazy it sounded, but he liked being taken back to a simpler, happier time when it was just he and Harvey. It always saddened him that he never got a photo of everyone, Grammy, Miranda, Harvey, and him.

“I worked for the DA’s office as a prosecutor. So, I’m not representing you.”

“Yeah I know.” Mike chuckled. “Awesome hair by the way.”

“Shut up. It was the style.” Harvey looked at him sternly jokingly. “Did the Harvard thing; I finished fifth.”

“Not first?”

“I was busy fooling around.” With anyone else they would have just laughed. But with Mike, Harvey instantly regretted saying it when he saw him look away. Mike just waved Harvey’s apology away saying he was an adult, and that Harvey was free to do whatever or whomever he wanted. He didn’t have the right to be mad. 

“Spent a couple years at the DA’s and then went to Pearson Hardman and now I’m senior partner.”

“Not name?”

“Not yet.”

Mike nodded even though it looked like he wanted to say more. “Why’d you leave the DA’s?”

“Long story short? My boss was burying evidence.”

“Shit.” 

Harvey raised his eyebrows agreeing as he lifted his glass to his mouth.

“So you got everything you wanted, except for the name partner thing.”

Harvey licked his lip, frowning. “No. I didn’t get you and Miranda.”

“That was a stupid thing for me to say. Sorry.” Mike quietly said. He poured some more scotch into Harvey’s empty glass. Feeling like he messed up, Mike didn’t know what else to say. 

“She’s an interesting kid.” Harvey said after a few minutes, breaking the silence. “How’d she get into records? With the way she dresses I figured she’d like more current music.” Harvey couldn’t help the disdain that seeped out when he said current music. That was something Mike and him always disagreed on. While Mike had some respect for older music, he was more of his generation music than his parents’ generation. Not that Harvey could blame him since his parents were fans of disco. So, Harvey was glad that it seemed like Miranda wasn’t influenced by Mike’s bad taste of music.

Mike laughed, glad at the change to a safer topic. “She calls it ironic fashion. She wants to challenge stereotypes. I swear she’s going to be an activist when she gets older, if she isn’t already.” Mike smiled proudly. She was always more mature than her age suggested. If she wanted to be she could be a great lawyer. “As for the obsession, I think my sister spent too much time at our apartment when she was pregnant. You was always had a record on, so really it’s your fault. One day I was cleaning up one of the backrooms at the store and I found an old record player. I still have some of your records. Sorry.” Mike took a sip of the scotch.

“I was wondering what happened to the Henry Ford and Ella Fitzgerald records.”

“Yeah, well, she really liked them and since then she’s been obsessed.” Mike smiled at Harvey, who looked like a proud father. “I worry about her. I always wonder if I raised her right.”

Harvey shrugged. “I think you did fine. She’s fine. From what I’ve seen she’s confident and independent; she’s kind of a bad ass. In fact she already learned how to decently blackmail people. She just needs to improve her people reading skills so she’ll know who to blackmail and how.” Mike looked at him quizzically. “She wants my record collection in exchange she won’t tell you that I got a boner in front of her.”

“You got a hard-on because of a fifteen-year-old?” Mike asked looking a little disturbed.

“It wasn’t like that. I promise.” Harvey laughed. “We were talking about the championship game I missed, you remember? Then I thought about what happened in the equipment room. Don’t worry I didn’t tell her about that.”

Mike let out a relieved sigh. “Oh god that equipment room. Why would you remember that of all things?”

“It wasn’t that bad. It was kind of a turn on knowing someone could walk in.” Harvey said leaning slightly closer to Mike. The deep rumble of Harvey’s voice sent a shiver down Mike’s spine nestling low in his stomach. “The blowjob was amazing.”

“Yeah, yeah. I’m talking about what happened after that.” Mike said blushed, dismissing Harvey’s statement and the feeling that was trying to awaken a dormant desire. “You weren’t on the mattress, Harvey. Face down, mind you. So you didn’t realize how disgusting that thing was. The entire wrestling team sweated on that thing. And you pushed my head into it. I thought I was going to get pink eye or an STD.” Harvey threw his head back laughing. He hadn’t laughed that hard for a while. Mike smiled missing the sound of Harvey’s laugh. But it did nothing to extinguish the fire burning through his veins. In fact it seemed to stroke it. “I can’t believe you got a boner remembering that and in front of Miranda, no less. She’s probably scarred for life.”

“She’s fine; like I said she tried to blackmail me. Plus there’s way worse stuff on TV.”

“You’re not allowed to teach her how to read people.” Mike looked at him sternly. 

Harvey smirked cheekily. “It’s a great skill.”

“For evil.”

Harvey licked his lip trying to think of how to word his thoughts. “You included the pictures of me with my…”

“Girlfriends?” Mike supplied. Not as helpful as he probably thought he was judging by the look on Harvey’s face. Shrugging, Mike said, “I guess it comforted me knowing you were doing fine. Reading those articles, I knew you moved on.”

Mike remembered the first time he read an article about Harvey dating a model. Rationally, he knew that Harvey was going to date people. But Mike had hoped that Harvey wouldn’t, that he would become a hermit living in the mountains surrounded by cats or something. That was the first and only time Mike went out and hooked up with someone. It was stupid and childish. But he had been so angry at the fact that he was angry. He didn’t have a right to feel betrayed. 

Harvey gently placed his glass on the desk and lowered his gaze to the floor. He thought about this moment several times wondering what he would say and would happen. In one version, he agreed with Mike, that he had indeed moved on and Mike walked away. In another, Mike yelled at him telling him to stop lying. Which version would this be? “Honestly? I never did move on. I guess Trevor was right, once you fall in love so deeply with someone, everyone after just seems second best.”

Mike placed his hand on Harvey’s knee sending electrical pulses straight to his groin. 

“Trevor?” 

Before Harvey could respond the door to burst open. At the sudden intrusion Mike jumped back moving his hand away leaving the spot freezing cold.

Both men look up at the red head standing in the doorway as she turned to the waiting room telling the people outside it would just be a minute. “Harvey, it’s been over an hour. The interview is only supposed to be fifteen minutes.”

He looked at his watch to make sure she wasn’t exaggerating. She wasn’t.

“And that’s not Rick Sorkin. I just sent Sorkin, the real Sorkin, away. I don’t know who the hell he is.” Donna said pointing her finger at Mike, clearly upset that another person managed to slip past her.

“It’s fine, Donna.” Harvey looked at Mike who was leaning down to grab the briefcase. He was going to leave. He had every right to leave; the police was probably gone so he wasn’t in danger. But that simple gesture shattered the hollow shell causing Harvey’s walls to crumble around him, leaving him human. Harvey couldn’t let Mike leave. Not again, and definitely not this way. “Actually, I’m not finished with this interview. Why don’t you finish interviewing the other applicants?”

Donna’s eyebrow shot up disappearing under her waves. “Me?” She pointed at herself. “You want me to interview them?”

“I should probably go.” Mike said trying to slyly get out of chair, stopping when a heavy hand fell onto his shoulder.

“Donna.” Harvey stared at her conveying that this was Mike, The Mike. “You know what I’m looking for. I’ll get you the Hermes bag from the printout that magically appeared on my desk yesterday.”

Donna winked. “Fine. Have a good interview.” She walked to the door throwing up air quotes behind her at the word interview.

“Sorry, I forgot you’re working.” Mike said trying to get up again.

“We’re not done, Mike.”

Mike chewed on his lip. “There’s more?”

“There’s fifteen years more.” Harvey cupped Mike’s cheek, stroking it with his thumb. “You were going to say something about Trevor.”

Mike furrowed his brow. “Oh yeah, Trevor never said that. Miranda asked me once why I never dated. I told her, without using your name, that it always seemed like I was settling for second best.” Mike rubbed his neck embarrassedly.

Harvey smiled lightly glad to know it was Mike who said that instead of Trevor. “She also said that he told her I was the overprotective type.”

“You really don’t remember who Trevor is, do you?” Harvey’s smile broadened when Mike’s face scrunched up in an adorable, puppy sort of way. “He hated you. He still hates you. I think the closest he ever came to saying anything resembling ‘overprotective,’ was that you were controlling and jealous.” 

“I can’t argue that. I don’t like it when other people touch what belongs to me.” Harvey laughed. “It’s not like he’s my favorite person either.”

Mike scoffed. “When I left, he was sure that you had done something. In fact, he almost keyed your car.”

Harvey rolled his eyes at the thought of Trevor’s immaturity. “Mike, I need to know. Were you sleeping with him at the time?”

“Why is it that every time we have a serious talk you’re asking me if I slept with someone?” The muscles lining Mike’s slender jaw jumped before he bit his lip. “I’m not your mom, Harvey.”

Harvey stared into Mike’s clear blue eyes silently asking him for forgiveness. “I know, but that’s what you told Grammy to tell me.”

“We weren’t and we aren’t, in case you were wondering.” Mike smiled sadly. “I said that because I knew it would hurt you the most so you would cut off all ties with me.” He couldn’t look at Harvey as he confessed that he used Harvey’s greatest fear against him. The night that Harvey’s mom left for good, a month after they had moved in together, Mike promised never to leave him the same way as his mom. Yet he did. “I’m not proud that I used that to get what I needed. I felt dirty afterwards. I still feel terrible.”

“So you didn’t sleep with Trevor.”

“Would you just get off of that and move on?” 

“Why did you need to disappear? Why did you lie?” Harvey quietly asked the taboo questions, the questions that he had been avoiding this entire time. He gently cupped Mike’s cheeks so that he couldn’t turn away. “Lying to me, Mike, it doesn’t protect me. It betrays me.”

Looking up through his lashes at Harvey, Mike said with his voice trembling, “If I tell you, it will ruin everything. You’ll hate me. Are you sure you want to know?”

Harvey nodded solemnly, wiping away the tears from Mike’s cheeks. As much as Harvey knew that Mike wanted to be reassured that he wouldn’t hate him, Harvey couldn’t make that promise.

Mike took a steady breath, closed his eyes, and told Harvey the truth about everything, about meeting Jessica and her propositions. Harvey told Mike to use Jessica’s exact words when he sensed Mike was holding back. The frown lines in Harvey’s face deepened the longer Mike told the story. He never realized just how manipulative Jessica was. Sure he knew she had worked with Hardman to get rid of the other name partners. But this…this was on a whole different playing field. Jessica was out of her goddamn mind if she thought he was going to sit back and let her control his life. Harvey was not a marionette doll for anyone to use especially by Jessica Pearson.

He had to pour more scotch when Mike told him that Jessica offer him money to move away and never come back to New York. He was glad that Mike couldn’t accept because Miranda’s home was here. He didn’t want her growing up and not being able to visit her parents. And in some twisted way, at least being in New York Mike still felt close to Harvey. So instead, Jessica told him he couldn’t contact Harvey otherwise she would destroy them both. That’s what she meant by ‘she held the balls.’ Every year, on the day they signed the contract, the day he left, she sent roses to the bookstore as a reminder. This year was different though. Miranda had contacted Harvey, so Jessica personally dropped the roses off a few days early. 

Mike reassured Harvey that it was a legal contract. He said that his boyfriend at the time was going to school to be a lawyer so he made sure he got everything in writing and kept the contract safe.

“You’re saying that in exchange for leaving me, she would promote me quickly. My promotions are the results of the deal you made with her?” Harvey gritted his teeth, pushing off of the desk to pace the room.

“It’s not like that. You got the promotions on your own; you still had to prove yourself to her. She just had to make sure the senior and name positions were available for you within 15 years. She’s supposed to make you name partner soon actually.” Mike clasped his hand together tightly in his lap missing the warmth of Harvey’s hand. He suddenly felt like he was five again getting scolded by Grammy. 

“Do you realize that if word got out about this, it would make the firm look like idiots? We’d lose clients.” Harvey said gruffly. He downed the rest of the scotch in his glass before he gripped it tightly barely refraining from throwing it against the wall.

“I’m sorry. That’s why I never wanted to tell you.” Mike bit his lip even though a metallic taste touched his tongue.

“Hey,” Harvey said suddenly appearing in front of Mike. He ran his thumb across Mike’s lip until it popped out swollen and red. “Why are you apologizing? I don’t like the fact that you didn’t come to me about this first. But as far as I’m concerned Jessica had no right making a secret offer with you. This should have been between her and I.” Mike looked at Harvey relief washing over him. “You’re going to bleed some more if you keep biting your lip.” Harvey said tenderly brushing Mike’s lips. “I get it though, you thought it was for the best. But what I truly wanted was for you to be happy, more than wanting to become name partner.” 

In their moment of complete vulnerability, Harvey and Mike knew from the heavy, palpable desire lingering in the small space between them: they never stopped loving each other. 

“You know what can help?” Mike asked. Harvey cocked an eyebrow before smirking. Knowing exactly what Mike meant, he leaned in touching his lips to Mike for the first time in fifteen years.

“You stole my best pick up line.” Harvey said flicking Mike’s lip with his tongue. He effortlessly pulled Mike out of the chair pinning him against the edge of the desk. It felt perfect. Having Mike between him, under him, touching him. Mike belonged there.

“That worked on someone?” Mike closed his eyes relishing in having Harvey so overwhelmingly close finally. They were each other’s world. In that moment nothing else mattered just Mike and Harvey. 

“Only one person. He fell for it every time.” Harvey sucked on Mike’s lip before releasing it to chase after the taste of scotch from Mike’s tongue. “He’s the only who mattered.”

“He’s an idiot.” Mike breathed against Harvey’s lips. Without breaking away, he slipped out of the suit jacket. Not wasting a second, Harvey undid Mike’s skinny tie abomination and took Mike’s shirt off. He ran his hands across his exposed nipples. Mike’s back arched at the sudden sensation, groaning when his hard cock rubbed against Harvey’s. “Just so you know I’m basically a virgin.” Mike moaned. “I only slept with one other person years ago; it was terrible.”

Harvey hummed as he nibbled on each nipple until they were hard and pink, sending Mike in a whimpering frenzy. He lathed each one, soothing them with his tongue when he was done. Mike whimpered, fisting Harvey’s hair when Harvey pressed his thigh between Mike’s legs. “It’s because your body was made for me. I am the only one who can give you everything you want and need.” Harvey said suckling on Mike’s neck as he rocked into him. Mike closed his eye, throwing his head back only to expose more of his neck for Harvey to attack. “I bet you still have a slutty mouth.” Letting out a breathy moan, Mike slowly inched his hand to adjust himself in his unbearably tight pants at the thought of having his mouth around Harvey. “None of that.” A sweet whine filled the air when Harvey grabbed Mike’s hand. Mike only moaned louder when Harvey pressed harder into him. Harvey gripped Mike’s hair pulling his head back; he whispered into Mike’s ear that there were people outside; it was like in the equipment room all over again. Mike attempted a quieter whimper. Harvey grabbed both of Mike’s wrists together; with practiced hands he tied Mike’s hands with his tie. Harvey unzipped his pants taking his thick, heavy cock out, holding it he said, “Want to find out if your mouth still knows what to do with the cock it was made for?”

Mike quickly fell to his knees, breathing in the intoxicating smell of Harvey’s musk. He admired the thickness, rubbing his cheek against it. “Fuck, I missed your cock. So much bigger than the other guy’s. So much prettier, too.” Harvey rested one hand on the back of Mike’s head and the other on the desk. Mike licked the vein underneath until he reached the tip. He licked the bead of precum off; rolling the bitterness in his mouth, he watched as Harvey panted until they locked eyes. Mike opened his mouth popping the head in; he flicked the slit several times before flattening his tongue to rub along the slit and wrapped the head. He smiled when he felt Harvey’s hand grip his hair. He took that as his cue to wrap his lips around Harvey and at an agonizingly slow pace he filled his mouth. He hummed around Harvey as he raised his hands to roll Harvey’s balls.

“Shit.” Harvey tightened his grip on Mike, pushing down lightly until Mike pushed back gasping. Mike softly kissed the shaft before keeping his mouth open as Harvey gave a few short thrusts. When Harvey pulled out, Mike sucked on the head, licking the slit. “Are you ready?” Harvey asked. Mike looked up through his lashes; he hollowed his mouth knowing exactly what Harvey meant. Harvey held Mike’s head in place as he fucked his mouth deeper and quicker hitting the back of his throat. He groaned when he felt the slightest pressure of teeth and Mike’s hands tighten on his thigh. Pausing, he held Mike in place as Mike hummed around him sending electrical pulses through him. Quickly he pulled out with a pop; he pulled Mike up to look at his debauched lover’s face.

Pressing his leg between Mike’s legs again. Harvey cupped Mike’s jaw thumbing his lip; Mike happily sucked on Harvey’s thumb when he slipped it into his mouth. “You’ve still got it.” Harvey said kissing Mike roughly.

“Please, Harvey.” Mike rasped when they broke apart.

“Please what?” Harvey kissed Mike’s jaw line massaging the stiffness out of them.

Mike groaned. “Want to come.” Harvey licked his ear and whispered a warm ‘not yet.’ Mike whimpered clinging onto Harvey like he was his savior as he focused on following Harvey’s command.

The two men jumped when the phone on the desk rang. Harvey stared at it like it was offending him.

“Specter.” Harvey growled trying to maintain his composure. He started palming Mike through his pants, giving him a stern look when his moans were getting loud.

“Hope you two didn’t break anything. I managed to convince the applicants that we needed to move to a different area and that you had an emergency regarding a case.” Donna said. “I found you your associate, booked you a room, where you’ll find a nice little gift there as well courteous of me.”

“You’re the best.” Harvey nuzzled Mike’s neck. Mike gripped Harvey’s wrist tightly not sure how much longer he could take. As if sensing it, Harvey moved his hand to fondle Mike’s nipples. 

“I know that’s why I’m getting the Hermes bag and I get to meet Mike.” Donna said before hanging up.

Harvey smirked replacing the phone. He pressed a gentle kiss on Mike’s well-used lips. “Do you have to go home tonight? You still have to come at least twice with me buried inside of you.”

Mike groaned at the thought of Harvey inside of him. “I told Miranda to stay at a friend’s since I wasn’t sure how today was going to go.”

“Good. I don’t plan on letting you go now.” Harvey said as he tucked himself back into his pants. “Donna got us a room.”

“I can’t believe your secretary found you an associate and booked you a room.” Mike said slipping his arms into his shirt that Harvey was holding out for him. 

“She’s not my secretary; she’s Donna. She’s the best at what she does.” Harvey replied buttoning Mike’s shirt. “And lose the skinny ties. I can’t take you seriously with them.”

“What’s wrong with them?” Mike grabbed his jacket following Harvey toward the door. 

“I’ll tell you.” Harvey leaned close to Mike’s ear and whispered exactly what he planned on doing with the tie when they got up to the room.

“Hurry up; let’s get to the room. I want to come with you inside me.” Mike flushed.

“You’re an insatiable brat.”

“Fifteen years Harvey. Not all of us were hooking up with models.”

“You’re not going to forget about that are you?” Harvey kissed Mike again.

“Eidetic memory.” Mike gasped before hurrying back to grab his briefcase full of weed.

Seeing the briefcase again, everything came flooding back to Harvey quickly bringing him down from his ecstasy. “I see some things haven’t changed. Do you still lose your keys?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just want to stress that Harvey did not get an erection because of Miranda. It's more like he was remembering something and she just so happen to be there. So there was no sexual content with the minor.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I took my love and took it down
> 
> I climbed a mountain and I turned around
> 
> And I saw my reflection in the snow-covered hills
> 
> Till the landslide brought me down
> 
> Well, I've been afraid of changing
> 
> 'Cause I've built my life around you
> 
> But time makes you bolder
> 
> Even children get older
> 
> And I'm getting older too
> 
>   
> "Landslide" - Fleetwood Mac

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter took a lot longer to get out. RL stuff started happening. I was trying to finish this story before RL happened...There's probably a lot more errors than usual because I just typed it and read it. I wanted to get it out quickly. So later on I'll probably edit it.
> 
> It's kind of a continuation from the previous chapter. So...more sex. Again fairly new to writing smut. But yeah let me know what you think. I don't think everyone will be happy with the chapter.

**Chapter 5**

Mike and Harvey made their way to the elevator; they gripped each other’s hand like breaking apart meant the end of the dream. Mike kept stealing glances at Harvey who hadn’t said anything since they left the interview room. The distant lawyer face unsettled Mike. Once inside of the elevator Harvey dropped Mike’s hand to run it through his usually perfect hair. Harvey was worrying about something, Mike realized. 

Everything that Mike had said in the other room was coming back to Harvey. Even though he chastised Mike for making a deal with the devil, he did too. And it cost him a life with Mike and Miranda. Just the thought that all this time they would have been together if he hadn’t chosen to go to Harvard, if Jessica hadn’t given him that offer, if so many things didn’t happen. As much as he wanted to hate Trevor for being an anchor to an already sinking ship, he couldn’t, not completely. Trevor had been there for Mike even though their relationship was a lie. All of these years Trevor was the one helping take care of the two people Harvey cared about the most, while he had the career he wanted. 

Then there was Mike’s confession about having been with another man. Before whenever Harvey thought about what they would talk about if they ever met again, he never thought Mike would talk about another man. It wasn’t that he expected Mike to abstain from relationships. It was that Harvey had been out enjoying the New York highlife with a beautiful woman while Mike had been raising a child. So it really wasn’t his place to have intense jealousy shoot through him in the elevator. But it was still there like hot oil bubbling under his skin. He clenched his teeth thinking about the sort of face Mike had with the other person. Right there in that glass elevator, he wanted to take Mike. Harvey wanted to remind Mike who knew all the places that could make him scream. 

“What’s wrong?” Mike whispered. Harvey raised his eyebrow barely looking at Mike making him feel even smaller. Mike squirmed under the intensity of Harvey’s stare. “Are you having second thoughts?”

When the elevator opened on their floor Harvey all but dragged Mike to the room. Once the door was securely shut behind them, Harvey pressed Mike against the wall capturing his mouth with his. Breathing heavily, Harvey pulled away stroking Mike’s bottom lip. “You’re intoxicating, you know that.”

“You didn’t answer my question.” The air was heavy with their desperate desires and moaning. Mike couldn’t breathe. He closed his eyes afraid of Harvey’s answer would be.

Harvey gently took the briefcase out of Mike’s hand. He shoved it into the corner essentially hiding the reminder of the marijuana, of Trevor, but more importantly of Jessica. Now that he had Mike, he didn’t want to let him go. But the case represented everything that they needed to get rid of to finally have the life that they wanted together. 

“Let’s start over.” Mike tilted his head questioning the other man. “No more secrets; no more lies. We tell each other the truth. No more holding anything back. Mike, I want you in my life forever. I don’t want to lose you again.” Harvey closed his eyes, breath shaking, pressed his forehead against Mike’s. “I can’t.”

The remaining walls that separated Mike and Harvey broke down. All of Harvey’s insecurity and vulnerability that he hid away came pouring out of him in waves, leaving behind the man he once was. The man who stood before Mike wasn’t New York’s best closer, he was the man who cried when his mom left even though he was the who gave her the ultimatum. The man in front of Mike was the man who was willing to drop everything to help raise a child. The infallible Harvey Specter trusted Mike with everything he had. 

Mike knew.

“I want that too.” Mike whispered giving him a chaste kiss. “But the question is will there be sex?”

Harvey laughed. “Lots, we have to make up for lost time.”

“We’ve only got time.” Mike slid his tie off from around his neck. “What did you want to do with my skinny ass tie?” He smiled cheekily.

Harvey growled. Slipping his tongue past Mike’s lips, he maneuvered Mike to the bed. “Stay.” Mike mockingly gave him a salute as he got Donna’s gift (lube and condoms) that was on the desk. Mike leaned back when Harvey captured his lips in another bruise inducing kiss as he started to remove Mike’s clothes.

“I should sue you for assault.” Harvey said when he pulled Mike’s pants down revealing an obnoxious orange and pink boxer briefs. “My eyes hurt.”

“I wasn’t really expecting to have sex tonight.” Mike said, his voice still raw from earlier. He groaned when Harvey palmed the growing damp spot on his underwear. “You’re getting hornier thinking about the law, aren’t you?”

“Why do you think I was jerking around at Harvard?” Mike gasped loudly when Harvey slipped his hand under the atrocity to pull it off.

Mike arched his back as Harvey dragged his nails down Mike’s stomach until his knees hit the floor. In one smooth motion Harvey swallowed Mike’s slender cock. Mike moaned, grasping the sheets in his hands as he watched Harvey bob up and down. Harvey’s tongue swirled around the head as he massaged Mike’s balls. He opened his throat swallowing Mike down until his nose was buried. Harvey’s tongue was that reminded Mike of everything he had been missing out on. Every time he tried to thrust up, Harvey’s hands pinned his hips to the mattress. Moaning, with one hand Mike reached up to rub his nipples when Harvey suddenly pulled off. Mike looked down meeting Harvey’s eyes he whined at the loss of the heat.

Mike’s cock twitched at the sound of Harvey’s rough voice. “Do I have to tie your hands again?” Harvey asked. When Mike didn’t answer, Harvey lightly scratched the insides of his thigh near his crotch. “When I ask a question I expect an answer.”

Mike whined shaking his head. “I want to touch you.”

“Never said you couldn’t.” He opened his throat and swallowed Mike all the way down again. He hummed when he felt Mike’s hands in his hair. 

“I should sue you for neglect.” Mike panted, pushing himself up onto his elbows to look at Harvey. Harvey smirked at the sight under him when he pulled back. A pink flush was painted on Mike’s cheeks; his enlarged pupils darkened the usually clear blue until they looked black. “You are clearly neglecting my sexual needs. I want to come.”

Harvey roughly squeezed the base of Mike’s cock. “From the sounds you’re making and how hard you are, I’d saying I’m being very attentive. So how am I neglecting you?” He smirked. Mike hid his face in his forearms trying to will himself not to come. 

“Harvey, please.” Mike begged. “I want to come.” Whining, he pushed forward trying to find Harvey’s mouth again.

“Tell you what, I’ll let you come if you can recite the definition of negligence.” Harvey sucked on the nape of his neck. Mike groaned as Harvey started slowly stroking him with just enough pressure to make him go crazy, but not enough to orgasm. He rubbed the tip gathering the beads of precum, spreading it as he stroked and gently twisted his fist. “I’m waiting.”

“A failure to behave with the level of care that someone of ordinary prudence would have exercised under the same circumstances—“ Mike said rapidly. Groaning, he gripped the sheets tightly when he felt a finger lightly brush his hole, circling it. Mike’s voice trembling as he continued. Harvey palmed his still clothed cock as Mike reciting the definition in a shaky voice. The look Mike gave him as he tried desperately to remember every word in the correct order made Harvey harder than he thought was possible. “The behavior usually consists of actions, but can also consist of omissions when there is some duty to act.” As if as a reward, Harvey pushed in ever so slightly.

“You weren’t joking about being a virgin. Fuck, you’re tight.” Harvey said biting Mike’s thigh as he pulled his fingertip out. He reached for the bottle of lube (he didn’t want to know how Donna knew which one to get). He squeezed a generous amount in his hands warming it.

Harvey kneeled in front of Mike again, sucking him down. Mike almost lost it when he felt the finger breach his hole. Harvey watched Mike slowly break down through his lashes as he bobbed his head and thrust his finger into Mike hitting his prostate. Unsure of what he wanted more, the wet heat or the nerve explosion, Mike keened. Then suddenly a second finger was trying to push inside. Once it was swallowed, Harvey twisted his fingers stretching Mike further. He crooked his fingers applying steady pressure on the nerve bundle that had Mike gripping his hair wanting this insanity to end and continue at the same time; he rubbed his hand down to his tender nipples. Suddenly the heat and the fingers were gone. He opened his eyes staring at Harvey’s almost black eyes.

Mike whined loudly, “Harvey!” He groaned feeling the cool air-conditioned breeze against his sensitive cock. He twisted his nipple trying to settle the buzzing under his skin.

“I gave you a warning.” Harvey growled. He stood pressing his thigh against Mike’s leaking cock. Grabbing Mike’s wrists and his nearby tie, he tied the wrist together.

“Harvey, this isn’t fair. You said you’d let me come if I gave you the definition.” Mike complained.

Harvey cocked his eyebrow. “I didn’t say when. I don’t intend to break any more promises.” Mike widened his eyes realizing exactly what he meant. Harvey rolled up the skinny tie and told him to open his mouth. Biting his lip for a second, Mike opened his mouth accepting the makeshift gag. “Skinny ties do have a use after all.” Mike rolled his eyes. “So you want to come?” Mike nodded silently begging his lover. Harvey smiled as he gently rolled Mike onto his knees and elbows.

Harvey chuckled softly before pressing an open hand to Mike’s lower back. Mike moaned when he felt Harvey’s warm lubed finger trying to push past the tight muscle again. All the muscles in Mike’s body snapped to high alert.

“Relax Mike.” With his free hand he gently massaged Mike’s back, rubbing out the tension before dipping down, dragging his fingernails along Mike’s shaft. He wrapped his hand around the head; Mike jerk when Harvey thumbed the slit spreading the beads as he slowly pumped him. Once the first finger slipped with little resistance, Harvey slowly pressed a second at the opening. “Look at you opening up for me. You’re doing so well, Mike, you’re so good, swallowing my fingers up. This is what you’ve been waiting for.” Mike mewled softly at the double sensations and the praise. Harvey released Mike’s cock; he trailed his hand up Mike’s body to his nipples, rubbing and pinching each one. Mike’s legs trembled when the third finger slid in and Harvey began to thrust his long fingers in and out slowly, circling the small bundle of nerves. It only took seconds for Harvey to find the right angle and the right speed to get Mike mewling and pushing back. He knew Mike’s body better than anyone. “Do you want to come? 

Unable to think coherently, Mike nodded.

“Go ahead, come for me.” Harvey whispered in Mike’s ear even though he wasn’t sure if Mike heard. He sucked on Mike’s neck when he felt Mike tighten around his fingers as his release hit his stomach. “Good boy. But we’re not done yet. ”

Harvey slipped his fingers out of Mike; he licked the fluttering muscle causing Mike to buck. He continued licking and sucking until Mike was writhing under him. Before Harvey stood up, he rubbed Mike’s ass. “Fuck, Mike you have no idea how good you taste.” 

Trembling, Mike sat on his heels as he watching Harvey slowly undress. His mouth watered when Harvey’s cock sprang free slapping his stomach. Once naked, Mike reached out with his bound hands tracing the curvatures of his lover’s muscles.

“Fifteen years of boxing and running.” Harvey breathed out. His cock twitched against his stomach feeling Mike’s fingers on him. “I’m going to fuck you. Do you want that?” Mike rolled his eyes before nodding his head when Harvey gave him a stern look. 

Harvey rolled Mike onto his back and hooked his legs over his shoulders. Mike watched Harvey roll the condom on and carefully warm more lube in his hands before smearing it around Mike’s hole and his cock. Lining the head up, Harvey looked at Mike’s lust blown eyes realizing that finally he didn’t feel hollow. He slid into Mike for the first time in fifteen years, just like he was only made for Mike.

Mike kept trying to touch himself, whining loudly through the gag when Harvey pinned his wrists to the bed. With a hard look, Harvey told Mike to keep them there or he won’t get to come again. He could see the cords of muscles desperately trying not to move, not to touch. Harvey gripped Mike’s hips and started thrusting deep and hard brushing against his prostate. Mike rolled his hips to meet each one of Harvey’s thrusts. It didn’t matter that fifteen years had passed; they still knew how to drive each other insane. It only took a few thrusts for Mike’s eyes to roll back.

“Don’t come yet, Mike.” Harvey panted still pounding into Mike at an unrelenting pace. Mike groaned when Harvey squeezed his cock staving off the oncoming orgasm. “We need to talk about starting over.” Mike fluttered his eyes open tilting his head. “Yes now.” Harvey said stopping his onslaught. “If we start over.” Harvey panted gripping the back of Mike’s neck and pulling him up. Mike mewled around Harvey’s tie at the sudden change of angles. Harvey licked Mike’s ear before sucking in the earlobe. “Are you listening?” Harvey growled before twisting his grip on Mike’s cock. He moaned when he felt Mike tightened around him. Mike opened his eyes pleading with Harvey to move to do something…anything. “If we start over, Mike, you drop Trevor and I’ll drop Jessica. We’ll start fresh. You can go to Harvard. We’ll make a new life just the three of us…and Grammy.” Mike’s eye fluttered closed. “What do you say?” Harvey pulled the tie out from Mike’s mouth and untied his wrists. Harvey leaned him back down and started slamming into him at an increasing speed again

“God, yes, yes.” Mike repeated. He reached up to pull Harvey into a kiss. “That’s all I want.”

“You don’t want to come?” Harvey smiled slowing his thrusts.

“You fucker.” Mike groaned. He pushed back trying to urge Harvey on, he was so close. 

“Only for you.”

“I’m going to tell everyone that you’re secretly—“ Mike looked up at Harvey just as he pushed in hard hitting him perfectly. Mike’s eyes rolled back as he yelled. “God!” Mike moaned. “I can feel you smirking.”

There was no point denying that he was smirking. “I’m pretty sure everyone knows I’m God. Everyone worships me.” 

“You’re going to hell.” Mike replied when Harvey stopped thrusting but kept his tight grip on Mike’s hips.

“All lawyers go to hell. But if I’m going to hell, I will be Satan’s goddamn saint if it meant being with you.” Harvey licked a long stripe up Mike’s stomach feeling all of his ribs. He groaned, resting his head on Mike’s forehead when Mike clenched around him. He was going to get food into him when they get home. He smiled liking the idea of turning the condo into a home. “The question is, though, will you come with me? And be a saint?” Harvey’s darkened eyes met Mike’s.

Mike groaned. “God, stop saying come.” He just wanted to come and all this double entendre was not helping, but Harvey’s grip on his cock was preventing it. Everything in him was vibrating; he was going to break soon. 

“You give me an answer and I’ll let you come.” Harvey whispered leaning down to kiss him.

“Yes. I’ll go to fucking Hell with you.” Mike said thrusting up trying to get Harvey to move again. “Now fuck me Harvey.”

“Come.” Harvey growled into Mike’s ear as he let go of Mike’s cock. Digging his fingers into Mike’s hips he started pounding deep, hard thrusts. Mike tightened around Harvey as he finally came shouting Harvey’s name all over them both. Harvey followed shortly after.

They lay there panting with their foreheads pressed together just basking in each other’s being. Mike watched with heavy eyes as Harvey pulled out and threw the used condom away, leaving him feeling suddenly empty. His whole body felt heavy. Soothingly, as if he knew, Harvey pressed small circles into Mike’s aching muscles massaging out the tension. He spent the most time on Mike’s thighs, ass, and back until Mike told him to stop he was going to get hard again. More like whined. 

Harvey rolled on to his back dragging a ragdoll Mike on top of him. “Tell me what are you thinking about?” Harvey said pulling Mike close to him to kiss above his eyes. Harvey wrapped his arms around Mike refusing to let him go for a second worried that he was going to wake up and realize everything was a dream.

“You. I’ve missed you, everything about you.” Mike mumbled burying his face into Harvey’s chest memorizing his scent. “I still love you.”

“I love you, too.” Harvey closed his eyes. He had finally said the words that he locked away. There had been times where he had a fling last longer than a month. He never could say those three words. After being with Mike, he knew what love was like. Everything that happened after wasn’t it. Not even close. But holding Mike again and having all the pieces fall into place, he knew. “I tried to forget about you, but I never could.” Harvey kissed the top of Mike’s head. “That’s why we need to start over. Just the three of us…and maybe Donna. I can open my own firm.”

“But it can’t be here because of the contract.” Mike said looking at Harvey. “And you’re not cut out for New Jersey.”

“Like I would go to New Jersey.” Harvey scoffed. “We can move to Boston and you can go to Harvard. You can whatever you want, but you have to get rid of Trevor. He’s only caused trouble. I’ll deal with Jessica.” 

Despite everything that happened, Mike nodded in agreement even though he wasn’t sure how he was going to break things off with Trevor. Trevor had always been there for him. When he wasn’t sure if had done the right thing, Trevor was there. Trevor loaned him money when Miranda got sick and needed the hospital. Where had Mike been as he watched Trevor drift farther away from him? 

“You do realize that Miranda is probably better at reading people than you.”

Harvey furrowed his eye.

“She’s still getting your records.”

Harvey barked a laugh. “I’m locking it up.”

“No you wouldn’t. You guys are probably going to be up every night analyzing each record and giggling like you’re having a slumber party.”

Harvey chuckled and nodded before drifting to sleep.

>>>

When Mike came home the morning after, Miranda was already sitting in the living room watching TV. She raised her eyebrow at the sight of his disheveled hair, rumpled clothes, and several hickies blooming on his neck (Harvey had insisted on making out in the taxi). She had asked him if he was wrestling using air quotes. Mike shook his head saying he was going to take a shower again. Then backtracked telling her to forget what he just said. He could still hear her laughing as he closed the bathroom door. 

Mike slowly undressed, leaving his clothes in a pile on the floor, and stared at the frowning reflection in the mirror. The entire night, Harvey consumed his whole being, mind, body, and soul. Now in the low fluorescent lighting and the safety of his home, he could actually think about what Harvey said. Gently he touched one of the hickies on his neck, wincing. He should be happy finally being with Harvey again, but a nagging thought kept tugging in the back of his mind. It had been fifteen years. Was that too long? So much has happened in both of their lives. He wasn’t that kid entering high school or the young adult in college. Back then, he had worshipped Harvey and did everything to prove himself to him. He went to NYU even though he wanted to go to Stanford because Harvey was at NYU. To some extent, he wanted to become a lawyer because Harvey admired the law. His whole young adult life consisted of wanting to be _wanted_ by Harvey. That’s what he got last night; Harvey knew exactly what Mike wanted and how. 

‘Am I still that kid?’ Mike thought staring at the frowning reflection. ‘Am I still looking for Harvey’s approval? He’s changed. Have I? What have I been doing these past few years?’

Harvey told him that the contract could be dismissed saying that it was basically extortion. But something inside of Mike didn’t want to take Jessica to court. It wasn’t the part that feared her. He was in awe of her. She did something he didn’t…he couldn’t do. Despite what Jessica did, Harvey accomplished his goals at one of the best firms in New York. Even at his best, Mike could never have given Harvey that opportunity. She did whatever it took to make sure Harvey, and the firm, succeeded. Under her wing, Harvey flourished. Jessica had been right, if he had stayed with Harvey, Harvey would have done the noble thing and stayed. He would have helped raise Miranda. Maybe they could have been happy together, but there would always have been the nagging thoughts of the ‘what ifs.’ And those thoughts would have slowly turned into resentment.

When Mike came back into the living room half an hour later, giving up on trying to hide the hickies, Miranda was still there ready to interrogate him asking him if they needed to have the safe sex talk and how she was too young to be a grandma. He rolled his eyes and told her everything about Harvey, his past their possible future. Then he grounded her for life saying that she shouldn’t be meddling in his affairs and blackmailing people. But he still hugged her thanking her for caring about him. To which she responded that he’s her dad so of course she cared, but it wasn’t going to stop her from gloating. 

For the next week Mike and Harvey were inseparable aside from working hours. Mike spent most of his nights at Harvey’s condo because he had a better view of the city and didn’t have a smirking teenage daughter. At first Miranda had been delighted at being able to have the place to herself. Mike trusted her to behave, but then she started calling at night and in the morning saying that she missed his terrible cooking. He had smiled understanding that she was getting lonely at the place. So, Mike would make her and Harvey dinner at the apartment before they put on a movie. Once the movie was over, she them both good night saying she was going to bed and that if they disappeared she wouldn’t miss them. 

They were happy. 

Then the calls started. Trevor called Mike’s cell and the store leaving messages that were becoming increasingly panicked. He kept asking where the briefcase was because the client never got it. Mike kept trying to convince himself to return the briefcase and never talk to Trevor again. But every time he thought about Trevor he would remember him as the kid who cried for a month when Mike’s parents died or as the kid of beat up anyone who tried to bull Mike. Then he’d think about the person who read to him how to change a diaper, drove Miranda to the hospital, and loaned him money when he needed. That was the person Mike kept waiting for. If he gave up on Trevor now, what would happen to him? So, Mike kept the pot hoping that Trevor would magically become that person again. 

>>>

A few nights later, Mike stood on Harvey’s balcony looking at the view of New York City. It was strange how the loud cacophony started to sound like music when he listened to it 40 stories up. Just looking at everything that Harvey had further cemented in Mike’s mind how far apart they had drifted. The previous night Harvey picked Mike up in a Tesla that looked completely out of place on his street, especially at that hour. Maybe fifteen years had been too much time to every go back to the way things were. But every time Mike looked at Harvey, especially in his suits, he knew that this was the life Harvey was made for. It was clear that Harvey’s extravagant life was simply too rich for Mike. His life didn’t have room for Mike’s panda painting that his Grammy made, threadbare clothing, or secondhand silverware. 

“What are you thinking about?” Harvey stepped out on to the balcony in his boxer briefs, wrapping his arms around Mike. He pressed his nose to Mike’s temple inhaling his sweet scent. It was the second time he had to ask Mike. Not that he was counting. It worried him that he had to keep asking. He never had to before. He always just knew what Mike wanted. It was in Mike’s face, the way the lines crinkled with worry or the way his eyes shifted. Harvey could read him before. But now he didn’t know what he was reading any more; it was like reading a foreign language.

“Why’d you say that I could go Harvard? Back when we were at the hotel.” It had been bothering Mike ever since that night. Before he couldn’t figure out what part of the deal bothered him. Letting go of Trevor troubled him, but deep down he knew Harvey was right. It wasn’t until the day after, when he walked downstairs into the store, that he realized what the problem was. 

“Isn’t that what you want?” Harvey frowned. It had been Mike’s goal to attend Harvard. Granted that was a while ago, and the plan had been for the two of them to go.

“I don’t want to go Harvard.” Mike replied finally turning away from the view. He looked up at Harvey and gnawed on his thumbnail. 

“That’s okay. If it’s about leaving New York, there are great law schools here.” Harvey gently moved Mike’s hand away. He was worried about something. Harvey smiled realizing that he could still read some of Mike’s signs.

“I don’t want to go to law school. Haven’t for a while, now.” Mike sighed before leaning into Harvey. “I don’t want to college anymore either. Jenny’s dad passed away last year and left the bookstore to her. She offered it to me since she hadn’t been to it in years.”

“What are you saying? You want to keep the store?” Harvey tried to hide the disdain in his voice. It failed.

Mike scoffed. “You say it like it’s a bad thing.”

“Because it is a bad idea. The economy for the bookstore industry is terrible now with e-books. You can do so much more than that.”

“Like be a lawyer? Harvey, I like the law and everything; it’s a convoluted enigma. But I like owning the store. Just come by.” Mike stepped back from Harvey, trying to convey all of the thoughts that he couldn’t put words. 

“I’ve been there. Several times.”

“But you haven’t actually seen the place.” Mike said exasperatedly. Harvey wasn’t getting it. The bookstore was so much more than just a store. It was the place where Mike found the books that helped make Miranda forget that she had a broken arm. Every time they read a book together it was like they went on a journey with the characters. That was their vacation. On rainy days, when hardly anyone came into the store, they reenacted scenes from the stories. Miranda hid behind the shelves of books, leapt over the towering stacks pretending to be a spy. And Mike was admired for his ability to remember every book and its location. He wasn’t a freak. Somehow over the years the store became their home.

“It’s a death trap.”

“You’re right.” Mike sighed realizing he wasn’t going to be able to get him to understand.

“If it means so much to you.” Harvey replied realizing how much the store probably meant to Mike. He didn’t really understand it. The entire inside seemed to filled absolute chaos. There were fiction books mixed with the science. It didn’t take a genius to know that the store was probably a safety hazard considering the way the books were stacked on the floor.

“Never mind. Let’s just go to bed.” Mike said walking past Harvey. 

Harvey’s hand shot out holding Mike’s wrist. “I’m trying Mike. But I don’t understand you’ve always wanted to go Harvard and now that you can, you’re throwing it away. You’re wasting an opportunity.”

“That’s what I mean Harvey! I’m not the same person as before. That was always your thing. I wanted to go there because you were there. Plus, I have to think about what’s best for Miranda. All of her friends are here.” Mike was nearly shouting, yanking his wrist back. He couldn’t stop the words from spilling out anymore. “It’s funny. I thought you were the one who changed the most. But you haven’t you’re still the same charming, protective person I fell in love with. But the thing is that I’ve changed Harvey. I don’t want the same things I wanted back then. What I want now…what I need now is to take care of Miranda.”

“Miranda and I get along.” Harvey drew his eyebrows down. At least he thought they were getting along. They had spent a couple nights watching movies or listening to records before he brought Mike back to the condo. Sometimes they would disagree about which artist was the best but he thought it was all in good fun. Did she say something? 

“As much as it may seem like Miranda likes you, she doesn’t know you. All she knows about you are the things that I’ve told her and a box of photos. You haven’t had to scold her or ground her or deal with every scrape and bruise. I had to.”

“That’s because you walked out. I didn’t get to do any of those things because you walked out. Jessica may have had a hand in it but you still signed. Signing or not signing are only two options when you’ve got more than a hundred other choices. You consciously decided not to tell me about it.”

“You didn’t want kids back then! Do you want to know what Jessica said to me? I would have been holding you back from reaching all of this.” Mike gestured wildly to the condo. “You know it. Every time you changed a diaper you would have been thinking about a Harvard class you could have been attending.” Not wanting to say something he’s regret, Mike took a deep breath and closed his eyes. “I walked out because I thought it was the right thing to do. So I’m telling you this now. Maybe we’re rushing into this. It’s too fast, too much passion, it’s…it’s just too much too soon right now. We need to slow down.”

“What are you saying you want to break up?”

“No.” Mike cupped Harvey’s face lightly kissing him. He held onto him until he felt Harvey’s arms around his waist. “You said we should start over. Then let’s do that. Start from the beginning including getting to know each other again. See what we’ve been doing these past few years. So don’t quit Pearson Hardman. It’s clear that you love that place.”

Harvey gripped Mike’s waist tighter pushing him away. He could tell something was off. It wasn’t just the fact that Mike wanted the bookstore or that he was suggesting that he continue to work with the person who backstabbed him. It was something else. It was the way that Mike looked at him almost as if he was begging him not to dig further. “Starting over meant letting go of the people who fucked us, Jessica and Trevor. That was the deal.” 

“Can we just stop talking about deals?”

There it was the reason. “You didn’t drop Trevor like you promised. You’re trying to cover up the fact that you didn’t do what you promised.”

Mike looked at the floor, dropping his hands from Harvey’s shoulders. He wasn’t sure how to explain his and Trevor’s friendship to Harvey to make him understand.

“It’s complicated, Harvey. He’s my oldest friend. I can’t…I can’t just let him go. Even though he did all this shit, he was still there when I needed him. He helped me with Miranda.”

“Do you still have the briefcase?” Harvey looked at Mike in a way that sent shivers down his spine, and not in a good way. It was the first time he was truly afraid of what Harvey would do. He nodded, too afraid to speak. “Get out.”

“Harvey! I’ll give it back to him. I promise. I just want to figure out how to help him.” Mike said anxiously biting his lip. He reached out to Harvey as tears started to leak from his eyes. “Why does the briefcase even matter? It’s not like I’m smoking it.”

“Because of what it represents. You’re attached to an anchor that has been holding you back all these years. Instead of getting you involved in a drug deal he should have been doing something else. Sure he helped with Miranda, but if he actually cared about you, he wouldn’t have encouraged you to cheat to make money. He should have been pushing you to do better; to do the things that you are capable of. He’s not a good friend. I wanted to tell you that before, but I knew you would have hated me.” Harvey took a deep breath and raked his hand through his hair, something he hadn’t done in years. Tilting Mike’s chin up at him, he gently wiped the tears on his cheek and sighed. “I can’t stand by and watch your life fall apart anymore because of him. So you have a choice, it’s me or him.” 

Mike couldn’t look at Harvey in the eyes. He opened his mouth uncertain of what to say. It was like his brain stopped working at hearing the possibility that Harvey may leave again.

As if reading Mike’s mind Harvey said, “Go think about it. I know you need some time. I need some time to think about what I want. But Mike, just know that I do want you. I love you. But I just can’t watch you give up on everything because of him.”

Mike nodded not trusting his voice. He quickly put on the rest of his clothes and headed for the door. As he neared it, he stopped and turned staring at Harvey’s back. “Harvey, just promise me that you’ll stay at Pearson Hardman. I think you’ll understand if you talk to her. I love you.”

Harvey tried not to think that it might be the last time he would see Mike.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm coming home
> 
> Tell the world I'm coming home
> 
> let the rain wash away
> 
> all the pain of yesterday
> 
> I know my kingdom awaits
> 
> and they've forgiven my mistakes
> 
> I'm coming home
> 
>   
> "Coming Home Part II" - Skylar Grey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the final full chapter. So it might seem rushed and a little slow. As usual I'll probably make minor edits in the coming weeks or so.

**Chapter 6**

After leaving Harvey’s place, Mike wandered the streets slowly weaving his way back to his apartment. He’s wanted Harvey all these years and now that he had him, he messed everything up. He was certain of one thing though: he wanted to be with Harvey. Taking a deep breath, as if facing his punishment, Mike entered his Harvey-less apartment.

“Hey what are you doing still up.” Mike leaned on Miranda’s doorframe. Soft jazz was playing in the background, courtesy of Harvey. “I saw your light on.”

Miranda looked up from her book. Even in the dim light streaming from her lamp she could see the dark circles under Mike’s eyes and the tight smile trying to reassure her that everything was okay. If she were to look at his eyes, she knew that they would be red. “You’re back already? I wasn’t expecting you until tomorrow.” 

Mike shrugged. “Glad to know you care. I’m going to bed. Good night sweetheart.”

Miranda frowned hearing the pet name. Mike hadn’t called her that in a long time. “Dad is everything okay?” She almost added if it was about Harvey before thinking better of it. “Uncle Trevor called asking for you. He…he seemed worried about something. What’s going on?”

Mike grimaced hearing Trevor’s name. “Nothing. It’s fine.”

“Dad. You’re scaring me.”

Mike pushed off of the doorframe, walking over to Miranda he gave her what he had hoped was a reassuring kiss on her forehead. “There’s nothing to worry about.”

“Is this about Harvey? I like him, you know.”

“You’ve known him for less than two weeks. You don’t even really know him. A box of photos doesn’t mean much.” Mike sighed repeating the same response he gave Harvey. No matter how many times he said it, he didn’t believe it. Somehow Harvey became a part of their family in just a matter of weeks. Miranda and him were so similar that it actually worried Mike a little. Mike gently moved her legs so that he could sit next to her. “I don’t either…”

“That’s the really the problem isn’t it?” Miranda placed a bookmarker in her book and placed it on the side.

Mike gave her a small smile and shrugged. “I’m just worried that maybe things have changed so much between us that we won’t work.”

“Aren’t all couples a little worried about that?”

“It’s different. We worked before. Now, I’m not sure how to get back to that.” 

“Obviously you guys didn’t work. Plus, why go back? Shouldn’t you be thinking about the future? So what if you and Harvey changed. Change isn’t always bad. Change is how we grow up. Stop thinking about Harvey as he was before and start thinking about him as he is now.”

“When did you get so smart?”

“You raised me.” Miranda smiled, patting his knee. “You know I’m grateful for everything you’ve done for me. I don’t say it enough. I love you. Even though you’re technically my uncle, you’ll always be my dad. You’re the one who raised me but this needs to stop.”

“Are you saying you don’t want me to be your dad?” The soft smile on Mike fell slightly. It was always a fear of his that Miranda would realize that she didn’t want to call him dad anymore. Her real dad died, he wasn’t her real dad. His heart broke every time thinking about when that day would come.

“No! Of course not. You couldn’t even if you tried. You’re more of a parent to me than the man and woman in the ground. You’re my mom and my dad.” Miranda bit her lip dispelling Mike’s fears. “You’re doing an awesome job. But you need to stop putting your life on hold. When I was born you dropped everything to raise me, and I’m grateful, but now it’s time for you to have a life. I always tried to make sure that I didn’t cause you trouble. I was afraid that you’d realize I was more trouble than I was worth. Before you say anything, I know I’m not that much trouble. And…I don’t…I’m getting tired of it. I never got to be a kid. I was always busy studying so you wouldn’t worry about my grades or helping out here so that you wouldn’t be over worked. Then there’s Uncle Trevor, I know he helps you and stuff, but Grammy told me all about the trouble he gets you into. You’ve always told me stay away from people like that. So when I heard about Harvey and the way you were before. I had to see if some how you two could rekindle it. And you two did. It makes me happy when I see you with Harvey, you just come alive in a way I’ve never seen you before. You look happy and relaxed. I dunno.” Miranda rambled, letting all of her thoughts escape her mouth. 

Mike smiled, looking at his hands. He knew he was relying on her more than he should. Too much for her age, really. She was forced to grow up faster than she should have had to. He was always busy running the bookstore or dashing off to the coffee shop to remember to eat, let alone look over her math homework. So she ended up learning to cook for herself using the little food that Mike’s meager pay could afford. On the particularly rough days, Mike gave her his portion replying he wasn’t hungry. Some times Trevor bought them food, which only reinforced how much Trevor did for him. What had he done for Trevor to make his life better? Harvey said good friends would push the other to succeed, what had he done to help Trevor? Nothing. Maybe Harvey was right; he and Trevor were actually terrible friends.

“You know he’s not like me really. He’s a hard ass.”

“I think that’s the point. Sometimes you’re more like my best friend than my dad. Sometimes I need someone who will ground me or give me a curfew. You know? Someone who will be more of a parent so I can be a kid who makes mistakes. I think our family needs a hard ass.”

“Are you saying I’m a softy?”

“Yes.”

“Are you sure you’re ready for that?”

>>>

A few days later, Harvey woke up earlier than usual, changed into his sweats, and ran. He wasn’t sure if he was running to exercise or to escape the emptiness of his condo. Once his legs felt like they were going to melt into the pavement he went back where he mechanically showered and put on his suit. The office was the last place he wanted to go to but it was the only place that didn’t remind him of Mike. 

“Harvey. You’re early like in the office before 8 early. I don’t have anything scheduled for you until 10.” Donna said. She looked at the clock on her desk, surprised to see him before 8. Even more surprising was that he didn’t have his usual confident candor and that his tie was crooked. “Jessica actually stopped by. She was looking for you.”

Harvey nodded wondering briefly what was going to happen when he tells her that he quit. Despite Mike begging him not to quit, he had to. Jessica betrayed him. It wasn’t the kind of betrayal that he could forget about and move on. She tried to control his life. 

“She’s up on the roof.” Donna said sensing that Harvey would first go to her office. 

Harvey nodded again and slowly made his way to the roof. Donna shook her head at his retreating back wondering what the hell happened to him.

If Jessica heard him come up onto the roof, she didn’t give any sign of acknowledgement. Together they stared out into the early dawn, watching the sun slowly rise over Manhattan.

“Here,” Harvey finally said handing her an envelope. 

Jessica raised her eyebrow as she accepted the envelope. “What is this?” She asked after reading the letter.

“My resignation.” Harvey said. It was strange. After being with Mike since the Chilton, he always imagined that there would be a lot more yelling and maybe even a page out of Hardman’s book. He even made a list of things he wanted to throw at Jessica. They were sharp and pointed. But now, on that roof, he didn’t feel like throwing anything. He didn’t feel anything except tired. His emotions had been flying around these past few weeks and now that they have settled he was exhausted. 

“I met with Mike.” Harvey said.

“Mike who?”

Harvey rolled his eyes. “You know who. The person you made a deal with and fucked with our lives.”

Jessica scoffed. “Goddamn Mike Ross. He came in a few days ago, told me that you were going to resign. I didn’t think you actually would. That kid has some balls. He’s grown up. He’s not the timid kid who would do anything for you anymore.”

Harvey quirked his eyebrow; that was not something he was expecting to hear. “You would know you held them.”

She smiled cheekily. “So have you.”

“What’d he want?” Harvey said changing the subject. This was not the conversation he imagined having with Jessica.

“Told me that he met with you and everything that happened. I did what I thought was best for this firm…”

“So it was just to increase your billable.”

“You interrupted me. I also did it for you. When you can see your puppy is going to make a mess on the floor, you have a choice between watching it happen and stopping it. I made my choice. And I stand by it. It may not have been popular or well liked but it was the best one at the time. Harvey, you were going to throw away your life.”

“I missed out on their lives all because you wanted higher billable?” The anger in Harvey started to rise. No matter what Mike said, listening to Jessica’s explanation made no sense.

“Do you honestly think I was the only one at fault? That day, I asked Mike what he was going to say to you. It had to be something that wouldn’t make you suspicious. When he told me that he was going to tell you that he was cheating on you with his best friend, I honestly didn’t think it was going to work. But you easily bought Mike’s lie. You didn’t even think for a second that maybe Mike was lying. I’ll tell you why, it’s because you knew deep down you didn’t want that life. You had been looking for a way out. So I created one for you. You may pride yourself in being able to read people, but you’re the worst when it comes to reading yourself.”

“It still wasn’t your call.” Harvey said as composed as he could. He shifted his weight suddenly feeling uncomfortable hearing his darkest secret laid out in front of him. She was right. Back then he had been looking for an out. He wanted to be with Mike; he loved him. He thought he was willing to do anything for him but before he knew it, Mike was gone. Once Harvey was done being angry and hurt…he was relieved. Mike was right he would have resented them. And Jessica was right. On any other day, he would have confronted Mike about cheating on him. But that day, he accepted it because he wanted to. Mike had given him an out without saying as much and Harvey took it without a second thought. Harvey’s chest tightened uncomfortably thinking about what Mike must have thought of him. It was the park all over again. Every time they fought, Harvey blamed Trevor because he was jealous. Trevor was willing to do anything unconditionally for Mike and Harvey couldn’t even do the one thing Mike needed. He let Mike go.

Harvey sighed. “When we were growing up everyone told me how much Mike needed me. But he didn’t need me. He never did. I was the one who needed him. And I pushed him away again.”

“You are talking to the wrong person if you want relationship advice.”

Harvey chuckled. 

“I knew this day would come eventually. I actually thought it would have been a lot sooner seeing as his store is only a few blocks away.” Jessica said looking in the direction of the bookstore. She was right. He passed the store everyday and he never noticed. Maybe he didn’t want to notice.

“Are you going to ruin our lives now?”

“Kid may be smart and may have balls but he’s terrible at calling bluffs.” Jessica smiled. “I was never going to. In fact here.” Jessica handed Harvey a piece of paper. “That’s an account in Miranda Samantha Ross’s name.”

“Is this right? Almost $200,000?”

Jessica nodded. “I’m not a complete heartless bitch. Every month for the first five years I put in five hundred. Then I took out a thousand every month from your pay. You clearly weren’t missing it.”

“Wait you told me that was union dues. I thought something was weird about that.”

“You’re an idiot for believing me. Why’d I hire you?” Jessica rolled her eyes. “Harvey, Mike didn’t make a deal with me for money. I never told him about this. I knew if you ever found out, you would have blamed yourself for not being there. So this was the only thing I could do.”

“I still can’t forgive you. You betrayed me. But I get it…I get why you and Mike think it was for the best. But it should have been my choice.” 

Jessica shrugged. “By the way, your papers I can’t accept them; they’re not valid. You wrote that you’re resigning from Pearson Hardman. If you meant Pearson Specter, then Donna can send me the new one.” Jessica said walking back down leaving Harvey behind. 

Harvey stayed up on the roof for a while longer thinking about everything that happened. Even though Harvey realized that he got almost everything he wanted because of what happened, he couldn’t forgive her. He wasn’t even sure he could forgive himself for believing such a blatant lie. And even now, Mike was still trying to make sure that Harvey got everything he wanted. What had he done for Mike, except back him into corners? Even though it was never spoken, Harvey gave Mike ultimatums, Harvey’s happiness or his own. Harvey always knew…should have known, Mike would always want Harvey to be happy. For the first time, Mike admitted to wanting something and what did Harvey do? All but laugh, dismissing the notion. Trevor would have given Mike the money support the store. As much as Harvey wanted to hate Trevor and Jessica, he couldn’t. He hated himself more. 

Slowly, Harvey made his way down to his office unsure if he wanted to quit or stay. Unsure if wanted to be happy with the promotion or yell in frustration.

“Harvey.” Mike said nervously standing up from the couch. “Donna told me that you were here. She told me to remind you of your 10 o’clock.”

Harvey continued walking into to his desk not looking at Mike.

“Can we talk? I brought you…I didn’t know what to bring really. I thought about scotch because it was our tradition…but then you…drink it all the time now…and so…I thought wine but it seemed weird. So I was at the market for like an hour staring at the alcohol…I thought we could use a different peace offering. Here just don’t judge me.” Mike hurriedly placed a clinking bag onto Harvey’s glass desk making sure there weren’t any papers underneath. 

“Mike’s Hard Lemonade? What are we teenagers? Wait did you scratch out lemonade?”

Mike blushed, biting his lip.

“So this is our new peace offering? I’m not giving you Harvey Wallbangers…well I might. Depends.” Harvey sighed. He shook his head trying to clear it of any of any inappropriate images. “Let’s talk about how you went to see Jessica and now my name is on the wall. Did you make another deal with her?”

“No! We just talked. She told me her point of view. Harvey I agreed with her. I think she did the right thing. But you got the name position because you’re good at what you do and you deserve it.” Mike replied his shoulders sagging a little at Harvey’s emotionless face.

“This whole deal still pisses me off. I talked to her. And I am at fault too. I let you go too easily back then because that’s what I wanted to believe. I thought I really did want to help you, but maybe I didn’t. I wasn’t ready to take care of kid.”

Mike nodded sinking into the chair across from Harvey.

“You knew didn’t you? That we would have broken up, if we had stayed.” Harvey scoffed. “I like Miranda.”

“You like her now because she’s mature. But back then? Waking up every few hours to feed her or to take her to the doctors or meet her teachers…it wasn’t the life you wanted. This was the life you wanted. And you got it.” Mike smiled gesturing at the office. “I guess now the question is does your life have room for Miranda and I? We’re a package deal. You can’t have me without her.”

“Is Trevor in this deal?” Harvey asked raising his eyebrow. “He can be. These past few days, I realized that I was jealous of your friendship with him. He was willing to give you everything and I couldn’t because I didn’t want to back then. Now I’d give you anything if it meant being with you and Miranda.”

Mike shook his head. “Trevor and I…we shouldn’t have been friends for this long. I was scared of losing another person and after this drug deal…it’s time to let him go. I’m not scared anymore…if I have you.” Mike looked down at his folded hands clenching them tightly. 

Harvey walked around the desk and tilted Mike’s chin up. “I don’t deserve you. Never have. What were you thinking about when Grammy told me that you were cheating on me and I bought it?”

Mike shook his head not wanting to say anything. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Please, I want to know.” Harvey stroke Mike’s cheek giving him a tight smile. “You must have hated me.”

Mike shaking his head, held Harvey’s hand. “I already told you, I said it because I knew you wouldn’t question it. I knew…how much you hated Trevor and how much hearing that I was sleeping with him would anger you. I was sad that you didn’t question it, but I also knew, and Jessica knew, you wanted an excuse to leave that wouldn’t make you feel guilty.”

Harvey sighed dropping his hand realizing everyone knew him better than he knew himself. He let himself think of Mike as an adulterer just to make himself feel better about leaving them.

“I’ve missed you these past few days. I understand if you’re still angry and hurt. But just know that…” Mike smiled softly unsure of what he wanted to say exactly. He promised Miranda that he would try to fix things with Harvey, but if he couldn’t he would be done pining.

“I’m done being angry at everyone, Mike. I tired of being angry. I’m tired of waking up to an empty bed, to an empty condo. Mostly, I’m tired of missing of you. So let’s do this properly. Everything that happened already happened. Let’s stop living in the past and start making a future for us.”

Mike smiled. “Agreed.”

Harvey smiled, leaning down to kiss Mike softly. “Let’s make this official.” Harvey opened two Mike’s Hard Lemonade and gave one to Mike.

“Are you supposed to be drink while you’re working?”

“Mikey, this is hardly drinking. It’s juice.” Harvey said clinking his bottle against Mike’s. “To our future.” Smiling, both men took a drink. “Was it always this awful?”

“Maybe then it will keep us from fucking up.”

“I dunno. I can make an amazing Wallbanger.”

“You’ll have to show me when we get home.” Mike smirked before getting up. “Call me when you finish work.”

“I am done. Told Jessica I quit.”

Mike laughed. “You have a ten o’clock, which is in fifteen minutes. And you’re going to need to do something about that.” Mike pointed at the bulge in Harvey’s pants.

“I can think of something that wouldn’t take fifteen minutes.”

Mike raised his eyebrows as he licked his lips. “Lead the way.”

>>>

The Star Wars theme started to play. Groggily, Mike groped for his phone on the nightstand. He looked over at Harvey who made no signs of waking up. After the sex they had Mike didn’t want to be awake at this hour either. The sun had only started to rise painting Harvey’s walls a golden yellow. Too goddamn early.

“Hello?” Mike whispered pulling on a pair of underwear too tired to care whose it was.

“Dad?”

“Miranda? What’s up?”

“When are you coming home?”

“Later today.” Mike padded barefoot into Harvey’s kitchen to brew a pot of coffee. For a second he let his mind revel in the thought that it was only yesterday when he and Harvey decided to give their relationship another chance. Another, another chance. “Sorry I forgot to tell you that I wasn’t going to be home.” 

“Dad.” Miranda sniffled breaking Mike from his train of thought.

“What’s wrong?” Mike straightened worry quickly coming over him. She hadn’t cried in front of him in years. 

“I was wondering on your way home could you get me some fish oil supplement. I woke up and realized I ran out.”

“Yeah sure.” The color drained from Mike’s face. It was code. It had to be she didn’t take any supplements. But with every thought running through his head he couldn’t figure it out.

“Mr. Ross,” An unfamiliar voice replaced Miranda’s. “Seems like you and Trevor owe me a briefcase plus the $50,000 that Trevor owes. I’ll text you the address of where to meet me with the briefcase and the money.” 

“You fucking bastard.” Mike growled right before the man could hang up. Resisting the urge to throw his phone, he pressed it to his forehead trying to think of what Miranda meant. Fish, oceans, sharks, no supplements, Omega-3—there were three people in the apartment. She probably woke up to them tearing apart the place thinking she wasn’t there. “Damn it.”

“Hey what’s wrong?” Harvey silently padded into the kitchen. He stood behind Mike resting his still groggy head on his shoulder watching the coffee pot do its magic. “You’re wearing my underwear, by the way.”

“Trevor got himself and Miranda kidnapped.” Mike said still in shock he turned in Harvey’s arms, burying his face into the solid chest. “They want the briefcase and Trevor owes $50,000. I should have given it back to him a long time ago. I’m sorry. I didn’t think it would go this far.” He murmured.

“We’ll get her back.” Harvey said coldly. Mike shivered, worried about what Harvey was going to do if Miranda was hurt. “If she’s hurt, I’m going to make sure he’s someone’s bitch in prison.”

Mike chewed on his thumbnail as he waited for the kidnapper to text him the address. He couldn’t help but wonder how Trevor managed to drift so far from him. He still had the briefcase, that wasn’t a problem. The money was another story. He’s never had that much money before. Well, not before, Harvey told him about the money Jessica had been putting aside for Miranda. Even then it wasn’t technically his.

“Hey, this is going to work.” Harvey said pulling Mike’s hand away and tangling their fingers together.

“I can take the money out of Miranda’s account or give them the deed to the store. That has to be worth $50,000.”

“I still want to see the store the way that you see it.” Harvey kissed the back of Mike’s hand when the phone buzzed. “This is going to work.” Harvey looked at the address the kidnappers texted telling Mike that they should go.

The closer they got to the warehouse the address indicted the tighter Mike’s chest felt. A million thoughts flew around his head until finally he did the only thing he could do reread books.

“Mike,” Harvey turned to him once he stopped the car. “I need you to stay here.”

“Harvey, Trevor and Miranda are in there. I have to…” Mike whimpered.

Harvey shook his head. “If anything happens I need to know you’re okay. I need…someone to be able to call the police if anything happens. Do you understand?”

Once Mike nodded his head, Harvey slid out of the car carrying a briefcase. He took a deep breath, straightened his tie, and walked into the warehouse fully aware of the potential dangers. But he couldn’t let himself think about those things, he had to focus. When he walked up to the door, one of the thugs patted him down making sure he wasn’t carrying a wire or a weapon before opening the door. 

Harvey looked over all of the faces, sizing each one up looking for the leader. His eyes finally rested on Miranda, still in her sleep clothes, she bit her lip and nodded her head indicating that she was okay.

“Who are you?” One of men asked stepping up to Harvey.

“I’m Trevor’s lawyer, except he doesn’t know he hired me.” Harvey said with more confidence than he was feeling. Regardless of all of the reassurances that he told Mike, he wasn’t sure if this would work. But he had to try something. “In this briefcase, I have your marijuana and a deal.” Harvey opened the briefcase revealing the drugs and a sheet of paper.

“I want my 50K.”

“I have something better. Right now you’re looking at doing time for kidnapping, extortion, and drug dealing…”

“We might as well add murder.”

Miranda whimpered loudly in the corner. 

“I told Mike that if he doesn’t hear from me in five minutes to call the police. The DA is a friend of mine.” Harvey paused watching the man mull over what Harvey said before continuing. “I have a picture of you and your…associates ransacking the Alcove bookstore. Now I can take this to the police. Or you can sign this agreement saying that I will become your lawyer.”

“Why would you do that?”

“Once I become your lawyer, I can’t be a witness against you. And here this is $10,000, consider it a down payment.” Harvey said handing the man an envelope only to take it back. “But see my retainer fee is $10,000. I don’t do pro bono. As you attorney I’m advising you to take the deal and let them go.”

Mike paced as he waited for either gunshots or Harvey to emerge out of the warehouse. All of his thoughts were on a loop as he worried about Harvey and Miranda. He should have given back the briefcase; he should have cut ties with Trevor. There were so many things he could have done to prevent this. If anything happened to them…it was his fault. Until finally, Harvey, Miranda, and Trevor emerged from the warehouse unharmed. Miranda was the first to look up and run to Mike squeezing him tightly as tears began to drench his shirt.

“It’s okay, you’re safe now.” Mike said softly hugging her tightly. “I’m sorry this is all my fault.” He continued to murmur as he rubbed her back. “Wait in the car, I have to talk to Uncle Trevor.”

“I’m sorry, man, I never meant for Miranda to get involved. You know I wouldn’t have done it on purpose. You should have just given me back the briefcase.” Trevor said once the car door was tightly shut.

“You’re like a brother to me. That’s why I bought you a bus ticket to Montana. I only want to see you when you’ve cleaned up. I should have helped you a long time ago.” Mike said unable to watch Harvey hand Trevor the bus ticket.

“What am I supposed to do in Montana?”

“Anything. Trevor, you still have a future so claim it instead of living in the past. Do something good.”

Trevor gave him a small smile before nodding. “Can I at least get a ride back to my apartment before I go the bus station? Thanks both of you for everything. Harvey, make sure he’s happy. He deserves it. Mike you’re still my brother.”

Harvey nodded.

>>>

Harvey sighed as he followed Mike and Miranda through the bookstore heading up to the apartment. He looked around finally seeing what Mike was talking about.

“It’s not much I know.” Mike said. He leaned against the counter, resting his chin on his hand as he watched Harvey take in the store. “Miranda is upstairs taking a nap.” Harvey nodded saying she deserved it.

“You could have done anything and maybe in the beginning you were working here because of the flexibility, but you stayed even though it meant getting another job. You rather do a stupid drug deal than leave this store. You’re right even though it might look like a mess, you know exactly where every single book is because you can’t get rid of any. This is where Miranda grew up.” Mike smiled as Harvey captured his lips with his; he licked Mike’s lip until they parted easily. Breathing heavily, Mike broke away resting his head against Harvey. “Keep the store Mike. I’ll help you any way I can, but I stop short of cleaning this mess up.”

Mike laughed picturing Harvey cleaning. “You know, I always had a dream that I would convert the second floor into a coffee shop after Miranda graduated.”

“Not dreams…”

“Goals.” Mike agreed kissing Harvey again. “Come on let’s go home.” Mike held his hand out for Harvey as they went upstairs. 

Mike and Harvey were snuggling on the couch watching a movie when Miranda emerged from her room. “Dad…can I talk to Harvey alone?” Miranda asked biting her lip and holding her arms close to her.

“But…”

“I’m fine; I promise. I just want to talk to him about something.”

“Fine.” Mike got up off of the couch. “I have to start dinner anyways.” He said as he sulked toward the kitchen.

Harvey took one glance at Mike before following Miranda to her room. He closed her door behind him sensing this wasn’t something she wanted Mike to hear. 

“I know I hurt his feelings.” Miranda said glancing at Harvey. 

“I didn’t say anything." He shrugged.

“You’re just like him.” She muttered. “It’s just not something I can tell my dad.”

“They didn’t…”

“Oh god no!” Miranda all but shouted putting her face in her hands as she shook her head. “That’s not it. It’s just…I wanted to let you know that I’m okay with you and him dating.”

“Are you giving me your blessing? What spurred this?” Harvey raised his eyebrow.

“The reason why I went to see you, it wasn’t just because of the money or because I was worried. It was because of the pictures. I knew how much you meant to him.”

“I know I figured it out.”

“When I was in that room with Trevor, I realized that the people who made my dad’s life stop was in that room. That if I wasn’t born, he wouldn’t have made that deal with Jessica. If Trevor weren’t my dad’s friend, he wouldn’t be getting my dad into trouble.” Miranda sniffled slightly. “I’m sorry that you had to suffer without my dad all these years. It’s my fault; if I weren’t born you would have been with him.”

“We never told you this because we never thought it mattered. But it was never your fault. Miranda, you keep forgetting that there were so many other factors to your birth. The day that you were born Mike made a choice. Either you or your mom was going to leave that hospital. Mike chose you. He chose you over his sister. But even before that there was a driver who went over his lane. We could continue all the way to the driver’s birth so see Miranda there are so many other factors. We can continue to blame someone else, but it wouldn’t do anything. With everything in life it doesn’t do well to dwell on the past. You can keep saying if only this didn’t happen, but it won’t change the future. It already happened. So, stop thinking about what could have happened if you could change the past and think about what you can do to change your future so that you are happy.” Harvey told her the same revelation he came to only recently. But somehow it felt right giving her advice…was this what it felt like to be a parent?

“Dad was right you are a hard ass.” Miranda said.

He cocked his eyebrow. “Are you sure you didn’t mishear him?”

She rolled her eyes. “When I met you I knew you were the opposite to my dad, but in a good way. This family was missing a piece and that’s you, the hard ass. Someone who can help share parenting duties so that I wouldn’t have to be my own parent. I can be a kid again, you know, do stupid things.”

Harvey smiled softly. 

“What should I call you? I already call Dad…dad. Father sounds so formal. Daddy is weird, so does papa.”

“Harvey is fine. I’ll know what you mean.” Harvey said walking out of the room. “Dinner smells…what the hell are you making?” Harvey said loudly letting Mike know that they were done.

“Thanks Harvey.” Miranda said smiling fondly to his retreating back.

“Hey! I can cook.” Mike called from the kitchen when he heard Harvey. He was trying not to be jealous that Miranda wanted to talk to Harvey rather than him. He tried to see it as a good sign that she was accepting him into the family. But he couldn’t help but be a little hurt. She always came to him for advice, granted he was the only person she could go to.

“I’ll be so glad when we move into Harvey’s place.” Miranda said when she entered the kitchen glancing at the bubbling sauce in the pan.

“What?” Mike turned looking at her. “Who said we’re moving there?”

“It’s obvious, his place is closer to better take-out place. The pizza place down the street isn’t the only place with food, you know.”

Harvey lightly leaned against Mike as he reached up to get plates. “Stop laughing.” Mike said. “I’m not feeding you. Either of you. Miranda take the plates and set the table.” 

“Since when do we set the table? Oh are we becoming that sort of family…” One look at Harvey, Miranda had a soft smile and left.

“So what were you two talking about?” Mike asked going for casual as he put some noodles onto a plate and poured spaghetti sauce over it. 

“Attorney-client privilege.” Harvey replied handing him another plate.

“That doesn’t apply to minors who didn’t have a legal guardian present.”

Harvey shrugged leaning against the counter. “She gave me her blessing.” He pulled Mike away from the stove so that he stood in front of him. “She came to my office to try to atone for being born. Don’t worry, I gave her some fatherly advice.” 

“This is so weird hearing you talk about being a father.” Mike said leaning up to kiss Harvey. “It’s kind of sexy.”

“You two are so gross. I’m telling Grammy.” Miranda pretended to look disgusted before taking the plates to the table. “By the way she’s upset that you left her out of all of this.”

Mike and Harvey shared a look knowing that after everything they went through, after all the years of wanting something they thought was impossible, it was all worth it. They were no longer haunted by a past they couldn’t change; instead they looked toward their future that was filled with happiness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is probably not the way most of you thought Jessica and Harvey's confrontation would be. So I tried to address those thoughts in the chapter. But it was the way I wanted. I meant for it to be very somber because it's more about Harvey realizing his own faults and realizing he blamed everyone else when he was at fault too. And that Jessica, in her own special way, was looking out for him and Mike. Should she have done what she did? No, but she had her well intended reasons. So yes I am happy with the way the story turned out. If you are unhappy with this chapter feel free to let me know, and please read the short epilogue that is happier.


	7. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You are the one, you are the only one I was born to know
> 
> Beyond the crush of any summer lust and we dared to go
> 
> To chain our hearts and tear apart and come together again
> 
> A lover's bane forever will remain and I remember when...
> 
> If we survive the storming and we're alive by morning
> 
> We'll never be the same I'll never be the same
> 
>   
> "Forever For Now" - LP

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it! This is just really a short little epilogue.  
> Thanks everyone for reading, commenting, and giving me kudos! I hope you enjoyed the story as much as I enjoyed writing it. I have another story in mind, but I have no idea what will come of it. Catch you guys later

  
**Epilogue**

**Two Years Later**

“Miranda there’s something here for you.” Harvey walked into the living room of the condo holding a small thin envelope. “Sorry, kid.”

“Let me see…” Miranda said sadly grabbing the envelope. “This says Michael Ross-Specter. You’re a jerk, you know that.”

Harvey laughed. “You really did get mail from Harvard.” He held a thick packet out for her.

She squealed knowing what it meant. 

It was strange how much things had changed in the past few years and how easily it all seemed to fit together. In a matter of days since Harvey became a name partner, Miranda and Mike were moving into Harvey’s condo and the second floor was converted into a coffee shop. Harvey made sure that it had everything that Mike wanted. On the grand re-opening of Alcove, Harvey finally proposed. 

Miranda looked at the framed photo of Harvey and Mike in matching suits, hugging each other as she and Grammy stood on either side of the two, smiling. The wedding was at the Chilton since it seemed fitting that their wedding would be at the place that brought them together again. All of their closest friends attended, including Uncle Trevor who swore he got a legitimate job and that Jenny was going to move out to Montana later. It was hard to believe that was only a year ago. 

“Wait until Dad gets home.”

She groaned. “He’s interviewing a new barista.” Ever since he added the coffee shop business had been booming, causing him to come home later than usual. “He’s going to take forever.”

“What difference does it make? You already know you got in.” Harvey asked raising his eyebrow. “What do you want for dinner to celebrate?”

“Anything as long as it’s not Dad’s cooking. You’d think he’d get better.”

Shortly after Harvey placed an order from the Thai restaurant down the street Mike came home, sighing loudly. 

“So many interviews. It’s exhausting.” Mike said kissing Harvey after putting his keys down. “Where’s the monster?”

“She has some exciting news.” Harvey replied. “And I order you curry for dinner.”

“Dad. Harvey made me wait.” Miranda said rushing out of her room, holding the thick envelope.

“So you never showed Harvey and I what you wrote. You know he was a little hurt considering it’s his alma mater. He was excited about the prospect of helping you even though it wasn’t on his face.”

“He’s lying. He’s more hurt that he only found out until after you submitted your application while I knew from the beginning. I kept telling him it’s because I would have found out eventually since you’re a legacy.” Harvey shook his head.

“Shut up.” Harvey laughed as he caught the dishcloth Mike threw at him. Miranda quickly tore open the envelope and screamed. Mike grabbed the letter from her hands to read it. Harvey held Mike still so that he could read the letter over his shoulder. “You got in! Congrats! I knew you would! Wait it’s personalized. They really liked your personal statement. It was the most touching and inspiring essay written that humanized an alumnus and shed light into the life of Harvey Specter. What did you write?”

“I wrote about the reason why I want to go Harvard. Two very important people helped me realize I want to help change the future of the people who are stuck in the past. Do you want to hear what I wrote?” Miranda said beaming as Mike and Harvey nodded. “Everything seemed to slow down; the sounds became muffled, he couldn’t hear anything. The only sound was the sudden cry it made after a nurse rubbed it down. A few nurses told him that they were going to take it down to the natal care unit for a routine check, but as far they could tell it was healthy and nearly full term. There were bittersweet smiles…” 

 

**The End**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just so it's clear (and you're probably going to roll your eyes) this story was Miranda's Harvard personal statement (minus the sex and the enormous word count).


End file.
